When I was young, it has always been my desire to be a pastor’s wife. Some of my friends questioned this desire. Well, honestly, there were times that I doubted this desire. But it stayed in my heart. I never thought that God will grant this desire not as a pastor’s wife for now, but as a pastor’s girlfriend.
I want to share this thoughts to all pastor’s girlfriends out there and to those who are desiring to become one. This might be subjective but I hope this will help you.
Be true about how you feel during tough times. When things get groggy, it’s okay to feel what you really feel. Sometimes, we tend to repress our emotions just because we don’t want to mess the relationship. but the truth is, it’s going to make the situation worst. Always say your feelings and inner reflections. Just a tip, when facing challenges, always take time to sit and talk the issue out– I learned this the hard way.
You will be watched. Whether you like it or not, people will really notice your actions, speech and responses in every situation. You know, the question, “How is she being our pastor’s girlfriend?”
Your pastor (partner) is not perfect. He has his personal battles in life. He fails. Do not think that he can do anything and that he cannot sin, he is a human. Embrace his weaknesses and help him find his strengths. Always pray for him.
Just be yourself. Again? I know, but this is so important. Do not work too hard pleasing other people just to be called “the perfect pastor’s girlfriend”, because we will never ever please everyone. Just be true and do your ministry sincerely, doing your best to be kind and love God more than anything.
You should be his all-time cheerleader. Pastors go through a lot of battles in life. Always be there to cheer him up. Support him in his ministry. Try to make him laugh and assure him that you will be there to back him up– with your presence and most of all, in prayers.
Be his encouragement, not his burden. Always be a channel of encouragement to him. Appreciate him and what he did for the church. Listen to his sermons and commend him. Do not allow yourself to be a stumbling block, but instead share with his burdens– through words of encouragements and prayers.
Do not compete with God. God will always be God.
Be flexible. Be flexible in terms of your schedule. When we are just starting our relationship, we always have our Thurs-date and Fri-date, but as months passed by, I need to understand when unexpected schedules popped up. Instead of having your quality time, you will end up attending meetings. Time is something you just have to be willing to sacrifice frequently.
Protect his calling. Do not allow the enemy to use you to confuse your partner. Or even do not start any argument when the man of God gets ready to minister.
God is preparing you for a greater ministry. I always believe that being a pastor’s wife is a calling. Remember that you are not in a relationship with just an ordinary person– he is a man of God. I believe that God is preparing you for a greater cause in the future. Be refined in the presence of God. Always spend time with God- in prayers and praises. I know that God will give you visions for the church.
The journey might be challenging but it’s going to be worth it. If you are in a relationship now, seek and serve the Lord more—together.
Another thing, always remember that you are blessed!