Day 119: My Experiment Nov 12, 2018
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Assumptions and Communication:
We learn, as early as childhood to: use thoughts and emotions to represent feelings, cloud our definitions with connotations, and to assume what others mean. Quashed early on in life are questions. We ask questions and are often considered belligerent, rude, or stupid. We earnestly ask for a clear cut answer and receive answers mired in assumptions. We continue asking questions to clear up the connotations. We are met with such answers as: “that is how it is”, “stop asking”, “why are you so aggressive?”, “because”, “it is what it is”, oooooooh I hate that one such resignation, or “everyone I know agrees with me”. “If everyone jumps off a bridge will you follow?” usually stops them in their tracks but not always.
We become cowardly and stop asking. Our cowardice is infused with “They will think I am stupid”, “I will be rejected”, “I will be alone”, or “I will be unloved”. We lie to ourselves about ourselves and life. We betray ourselves and the truth selling out for illegitimate safety. Instead of having courage to be we conform to the group lie.
Government run schools indoctrinate and most comply. Parents, like so many of us, are willfully ignorant saturated in their own un-examined lives. The easily influenced fearful masses are targets for the media, group-think- resistance is futile. What is truly astonishing is that we buy into it! We prefer the safety of our lies than to free ourselves from assumptions. For acceptance to a particular group we comply, agree, and stop asking questions.
There are questions that carry their own assumptions. Those questions result in further obfuscate communication. Questions that clear up assumptions are directed at the assumption itself. For example: “How do you feel?” “I feel insulted” “Is insulted a feeling or a thought?” “Ah it is a thought.” Of course further questioning might be required if they answer that insulted is a feeling. Insulted may, though, evoke a feeling. The feeling may be contraction or tension when someone assumes they have been insulted. Some people are insulted and feel contraction the moment they are asked a question about their beliefs, assumptions, and connotations. They claim they are being attacked. They claim insult. They claim abuse. Ultimately clear definitions are abusive. It is like saying: “This is my reality. I have defined it. Accept it or else!” We conform or rebel in reactionary ways or we are the true rebel. We courageously continue to question. We have the courage to forge onward on our journey towards truth. We abandon the lies for truth. Freedom from the known is a courageous act. Adherence to the known is antiquated and volitional ignorance. Self-awareness is not an easy task but neither is living a limited, ignorant, conflict ridden existence. The latter only makes things worse at the minimum we can consider what will NOT make things worse.