I have been asked with this question a lot. I don’t know why my friends see me as a love guru when in fact I’m no one but another toxic soul. Hahaha no kidding, yes I’m not perfect and nobody really is but somehow I get to give love advice that actually works on other people but never on me. Feel me? So here’s one more question we’re going to answer for those people struggling to raise their worth but always ended up being confronted with just their mistakes.
If your partner keeps on finding fault on you, LEAVE! No more buts, no more ifs! Just leave! He/she never sees your worth and will continue being blind even if you slap your worth on their faces. You can’t possibly force someone to treat you nice the way you deserve. It’s their duty to make you feel at ease and loved. If that respect is not being reciprocated then the relationship you’re in is just another heartbreak playlist you are going to listen in the future.
Well, I hear you plead once more. What if they’ll change? You wanna wait a little more? Hmmm. This isn’t really a question, is it? Because even if I tell you to cut the crap off, you won’t. And even if I assure you that you’re not the toxic one like they always tell you, it’s already embedded in your mind. So here’s what might help you get through it:
Spend a whole day with just yourself. Not the kind of alone that seems lonely but the kind of alone time that actually relaxes your mind. Think of when you’ll do this and what you’re going to do. It could be a spa, shopping, reading a good book, watching a heartwarming movie or anything. Make sure to start it the night before. Rest your mind from all what ifs and just stop giving a fck about everything. Do yourself a favor and just sleep so when you wake up in the morning you’re ready to start your day like a clean slate. If they text you within the day, it’s okay to reply. Keep a cool tone and never start a conversation. Just reply to whatever they’re asking. Then go on.
After a day of “me-time”, reflect on it and write your feelings about it. Tell someone, a dear friend, about how you feel. Express everything. Make sure that this someone you are going to confide into is not the same person that’s giving you trouble sleeping. If you can’t think of anyone, you could write a blog or pray. Do whatever suits you. Just make sure you release the bottled up emotion.
Lastly, forgive. Accept that not everyone is going to give you the peace of mind you deserve. Some will really get into your nerves. And a few will just make you want to snap. If they hurt you, you can’t do anything but feel the pain, accept and move forward. Let them break you, but never let them break you again and again.
In life, you’ll meet different people with different attitudes. Some will love you and some won’t. But you know who’s going to ever be faithful to you? Yourself! So never lose yourself in the process of loving someone so much. When everyone leaves, make sure that the one that’ll forever stay is YOU! You have to learn to be okay with everyone leaving. You have to start showing them your worth. If you’ll learn to love yourself enough then that would make them feel intimidated because you actually know what you deserve. And by that, they’ll never ever dare to love you half-heartedly ever again!
This has been 
saying, "Self-love isn’t selfish. It is you giving yourself what you truly deserve."
Nikka Ganzan Paraguya Mededa, the author
I was destined to be a successful civil engineer but my heart belongs to literature. And if I have learnt something from the past years of struggles, it is maybe this - "Sometimes a leap of faith is what you need in order to find happiness. Because if you are not to become a happy person, then what's the purpose of life then?".
I tried working in an industry with the use of my maximum skills in my chosen field and I was earning big (bigger than what I expected), yet I was not happy. In between those times, I found deeper and stronger interest in my first and second love - writing and photography.
And so here I am, in my little corner in the blockchain. I hope you had a good read and check out more here --->