Valentine's Day is upon us!
Which means a curated set of gift guides for that special someone in your life (NOT).
If she's a romantic, she'll adore lavender scented box of poems
If he's a nature lovin' lumberjack of sorts, he'll love that designer beard grooming kit!
If you and your partner value the latest trends, then sure.
Otherwise what winds up happening is disappointment on each person's end.
In order to successfully express your love to your partner, you need to understand their "love language".
Gary Chapman, author of the bestselling book The 5 Love Languages sheds light on how we each express love through our own love language.
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Whether it be words of affirmation, physical touch, acts of service, gift giving or quality time, chances are you're going to have at least one primary and secondary language.
You can easily discover what you and your partner's primary/second love languages are by taking the short online quiz on his site
Alternatively, you can look into the way you each express love to one another. That's a huge indicator into what you value most.
For instance:
If you have a flair for words (words of affirmation), you might express your love to your partner through a handwritten card
Whereas if you value acts of service, you'll probably express it to them through a thoughtful gesture like picking them up and bringing them to a fancy restaurant
If you're constantly showering them with affection, you value physical touch
There's a good chance you're expressing your love to them through your own love language.
Why?
We all filter love through our highest values
We're all guilty of expressing love in the way we want to receive it
For example
A partner who values romance, might invest hours creating a video compilation of cute memories only to be disappointed by their partner's lack of enthusiasism
Whereas, a partner whose primary love language is acts of service might not get the same positive reception with a partner who values affection/words of affirmation over an expensive dinner.
Once you discover your partner's love language, you can stop giving them oranges when what they really want is apples.
Bottom Line: Express love in the way they value it most