Marriage was God’s gift to a perfect world. He had said, ‘It is not good that the man should be alone’, even when that man was without sin and living in holy communion with God. God in kindness saw fit to make a companion for Adam – another human being, not identical to him, but corresponding to him. God said further: ‘I will make him an help meet for him’ (Gen.2:18) – a help suitable for him. After a brief description of how Eve was formed, we are told: ‘Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh’ (Gen. 2:24). This is the product of divine, not human wisdom.
How is marriage such a gift? I realize there are some that may question that notion! Marriage is God’s way of creating the ultimate opportunity for fulfillment of the deepest longings of the human soul.
We long to be intimately connected to another–not just physically, but emotionally, spiritually and sexually as well. This complete knowing and being known by another in such a deep and profound way is available only within the bonds of marriage as designed by God, Himself.
Elder Clayton suggests in his quote that the quality of our marriage is our gift back to God.
As a marriage counselor and sex therapist I imagine that because of the very difficult work of bringing two people together to become ONE–emotionally, spiritually and sexually our Heavenly Father is so grateful for any efforts we make to increase the quality of our marriages, which inevitably increases the perfection of each spouse.
I once attended a wedding where the pastor officiating at the ceremony said, “When you’re in a marriage you’re on the same team, you’re not on opposing sides working against each other. Your traveling together on this journey, helping each other and supporting each other. You’re not trying to compete to get your own way, or to see who is best, it’s a partnership in the Lord.” Remember this when you approach your spouse in a loving way about the condition of your marriage. Without accusing, seek for the root of the problem, ask your spouse what he or she may be feeling, as well as letting them know what’s on your heart. Come together in prayer with your spouse seeking the Lord’s guidance for how healing can begin in your marriage.
It was our first year of being married and we were on a trip in Zambia. Sadly, Sam had come down with malaria and was laid up suffering fever, chills and depression which often accompanies a bout of malaria. I, on the other hand, was selfishly lamenting that my first birthday married was spent with a sick husband in a distant place away from civilization and that he had overlooked giving me a present (yes, I blush to admit it). It was a bit of a pity-party going on in my soul – and I daresay, not pleasing to the Lord. But I had to work it through slowly, with much prayer.
I know there are times that I complain, that I compare, covet, and harbor unthankfulness… for all of those times I am truly sorry. I repent from being negative towards the gifts You have graciously given me and I choose to sow gratitude. Thank You for my husband. Thank You for his unique ways and our imperfect relationship. Thank You for showing us how to forgive and love deeply. I choose to sow gratitude so that I may leave a legacy of love in my family! Thank You Lord for not giving up on me. Thank You for opening my eyes to the healing power of having a thankful heart.
