Talking about marriage the first thing that come to the mind of most people are living together & building a happy and everlasting marriage life. How to maintain and achieve that is another question. Of course every couples hope for a long lasting relationship with their spouse. Come to think of it marriage does not guarantee you will be together forever, it's only on paper but to achieve a good relationship and strong bond of love you need to build up certain qualities as listed below. In other words you need to work out your marriage life from time to time.
- Fairness.
- Respect.
- Sincerity & Honesty.
- Love.
- Patience.
- Consideration.
- Spending quality time together.
- Trust.
- Transparent with your spouse.
- Decision making together.
- Loyalty & Faithfulness.
- Tolerate and bare burden together with your spouse.
It takes love, respect, trust, understanding, friendship and faith in your relationship to make it last.
Marriage is not only about
- sex
- building own family
- seeing children growing up.
- seeing children success in their studies and career.
But the importants of marriage are both couples must be able to sail together in the same boat not only in good times but at the same time enduring suffering together in times of adversity and uncertainty. To think of it there are up and down in a marriage life. No marriage life are without problems. How you faced your marriage life determined how matured you are in tackle and solving the problems that were dissolved the frictions and tensions in a marriage. Learn not to solve the problems by choosing to live a separate life or ending into divorce. These don't help to solve the problems.
You need to work out further to achieve happy and everlasting marriage life. Firstly you need to love your spouse. People used to say no money no love. But let me tell you that no love no relationship between husband and wife.
To understand what love means let me show you from Jesus point of view about love in 1 Corinthians 13 verse 4-8. Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres and love never fails.
How can you said you love God whom you can't see where else you can't even love your spouse whom you can see. This is a very BIG QUESTION which I used to hear people saying they love God. But sad to say they don't really understand the true meaning of love. To these type of marriage couple love is all about sex only. What a very swallow understanding of the meaning of love in them.
Happy marriage life need to be build up from time to time. And never ever take it for granted after having your spouse as your life partner. Respecting one another in action and usage of words contribute to everlasting marriage life. Be very careful with the words you use when communicate with your spouse so that it wont lead to misunderstanding and hurting the emotion. On top of that faithfulness and loyalty towards your spouse also play important roles to maintain a happy and everlasting marriage life.
Faithfulness and loyalty are very importants in the area of overcoming misunderstanding and help to build up trust between husband and wife. Sad to say that many couples end up living a separated life and divorce because of unfaithfulness and disloyalty towards one another. Never ever take your spouse for granted. If you love your spouse you dare not hurt your spouse feelings. In happy and everlasting marriage life need two ways traffic. Both husband and wife play a very important role here. Never ever pinpoint on one another. Never ever put a blame on your spouse and always admit that your spouse is wrong and you are right. If problems arises because of friction due to negative circumstances both husband and wife must come together to discuss and talk nicely with one another to solve the issue. Never ever make a decision without seeking the oppinion between husband and wife. Learn to be humble with one another in solving marital problems. Get rid of the attitude of EGO, PRIDE and ARROGANT.
Learn to reflect back on how come before marriage no friction? How come before marriage both can tolerate and respect one another ?
How come before marriage both dare not take one another for granted? How come before marriage both dare not offend the feelings of one another?
The answer is very simple that's taking one another for granted. Thinking that you have already sign contract to share a life together and that's where the true colour appear. This type of thinking and mindset are very immature. A mature couple were not behave that way. A mature couple were learn to solve marital problems in a mature ways. Separation or divorce is just the beginning to other problems.
Honesty and sincerity are also very importants in building up happy and everlasting marriage life. Both husband and wife have to be transparent with one another. When problems arises dont just sweep under the carpet. Learn to be honest and sincere with one another. Learn to say sorry eventhough you are not wrong. Dont wait for your spouse to start saying sorry. For this case it should be two ways traffic. Honesty and sincerity help to buildup trust and bond of love. For husband never ever praise other women infront of your wife. Likewise wife never ever praise other man infront of your husband.
Learn to spend quality time together by going for holidays or eating outside together or window shopping together or maybe sightseeing together. By doing so you are not wasting time but come to a stage you were notice that both husband and wife have buildup closer relationship and more itimate with one another.
For husband never ever compare your wife with other lady. Likewise for wife never ever compare your husband with other man. The side effect of comparison were lead to jealousy, hurting the feelings, misunderstanding and the worst of it is lead to broken relationship. Always learn to improve oneself.
Always learn to accept your spouse as who she or he is. Learn to accept the weaknesses of your spouse and help to overcome the weaknesses. Happy and everlasting marriage life can be achieve. The choice is all yours.
Hope this article give you some wisdoms on how to strengthen your relationship in marriage. If there is a way there is a hope and a will.
In conclusion learn to give and take in whatever area of our lives. Avoid selfishness and self-centeredness. Learn to bare with one another attitude and character. Learn to forgive and forget, eventhough memory still a memory. But from Jesus point of view, if Jesus can forgive by dieing on the cross for the salvation of mankind how come we can't forgive others.
Here I would like to end my article with this lovely song.
WHEN GOD MADE YOU
