Far back in the 60s to 80s, marriages had some semblance of purposefulness compared to this present generation. Some Marriages were far from "happily ever after" but they never broke apart. The wives was still loyal to her husband in good and bad times.
In this current dispensation, the increase in divorce in our society is at an alarming rate. There is this feeling of disdain from the older generation towards the new generation concerning how they have soiled society’s smallest, most important unit. ( marriage ). A lot of people just wake up one day and jump into marriage without even giving It a second thought and In just a matter of months of been married, divorce becomes the only option. You begin to wonder, where this couple ever in love with each other.
According to "Chris izu okafor" :
The prime factor that has changed in Nigeria marriages is the reaction of women to the previous established societal equations of marriage.
I totally agree with this statement because in the 21st century where there is unfiltered flow of information in the internet or on social media, women have learnt that they are equally as valuable to the echelon of things.
Also in a world where I. Q is now a major factor to attain a high level in the society, they now have as much right to compete with the male folks. This has brought about a shift in the mentality of women folks and has lead to women challenging there women roles in Nigeria marriages.
Another reason is that, back in the days, domestic violence has always been there in marriage but the women are always meant to endure due to the Nigeria culture of silence which a lot of people misunderstood as Bliss. You see women been abuse but for the sake of peace to reign and because of the children, they stay back.
All this reason's know longer hold water again because with the advent of social media, women have been able to harmonize there uproar and speak against domestic violence. Even women of yesteryears, who will always keep silent, now use internet as a tool for sharing there ordeal .
CULTURAL REVOLUTION IN TODAYS MARRIAGE IN NIGERIA.
We were made to understand that, culture is the way of life of people in a geographical location but it doesn't mean culture is static like the way it is sometimes perceived in Nigeria. Culture is both dynamic and transferable. For instance, in the Nigeria society, we are familiar with words like:It's the culture for every man to dictate in his family. But in this 21st century, this norms are been challenged. We have to accept the fact that marriage culture is changing in Nigeria.
- For instance, in the past, man had society on his side, that is to say "women had to overlook and reluctantly forgive the unfaithful and abusive husband of yesterday in marriage but for the men, society had a way of reversing rules, Probably because of men ego. But in today's marriage, all this are changing. Men has to understand that the responsibilities for his actions and inactions in marriage would not be shielded by the woman choosing to stay in her husband's house.
- Over dependence.
Let me use a short example to buttress this point. It was easy for our parents to control us, growing up as little kids but as you grow up and start earning your own money and no longer depended on your parents, that control stops. The same thing applies in Nigeria marriages. Dependency usually culminates total control by the providing party. In the past, a lot of women depended on there husbands but husbands needs to understand that the trend has changed. This days women now work for there money and can even have there own house.
The defined norms of yester-years are being challenged and only those who wish to operate their unions in the context of these new terms or those that have explicit conformists of the past ideas as partners, will thrive in this cultural revolution of the Nigerian Marriage.