Hello Crissy, I am so saddened by your story but I need to tell my friend, you're not nuts and you are conquering this attack on your person. No, one can care for animals as much as you do, and not acknowledge the existence of God. You already know, that luck is a load of crap. We make our own "luck". Sorry, no words of wisdom from me, except, I'm praying for your safe return of your children. God bless you. Regards, Andre'