So I Went A Little Crazy
If you have never been committed to a mental institution say NOT IT. Yup. I can't do that anymore. I am fine but apparently need to lay off the stress for a bit.
A Party With Friends
Otherwise, I throw a party in my head and everyone is invited. Apparently, I am lucky because it is a pretty good time. The most awkward thing was realizing you need to poo and no one is going to give you any privacy. I was aware the whole time this was not real but still obnoxiously not normal. Apparently, I have skitzoaffective disorder brought on by stress and am one of the lucky rare people that just have a bunch of people that want to have fun. IT makes you look crazy though. You are crazy. Walmart shopping is not suposed to be that much fun. Things are back to normal though. It was crazy fun and I almost look forward to my next mental breakdown. The only sad part is realizing that all of the reunions with old friends didn't really happen and if you contact them saying you had a blast you will get back confusion. As long as it is controlled I think this will be a thing that helps me when I am really struggling. You have no idea how nice it would have been to actually share the experience instead of it going on in some part of the brain we still do not understand. It was so real even if I was aware it was not. The fact that the times were not shared makes me cry and perhaps slip a bit away from sanity. They have pills for that though. Pills that make gone friends go. It makes me sad but sometimes reality just is. But as far as going crazy my kind kicks ass, even if functioning is not a thing at least I have the comfort of knowing if I get lost I will be happy with friends, most people in that place were screaming in fear. I never want to go back to the loony bin. They took away what was stressing me out. All the friends I had lost that I can't seem to live without.