When pointing the finger at others you are actually pointing 3 at yourself….. I heard this said today. Not at me, but mentioned in a conversation. The next few sentences she said are all a little blur. I was still truly processing her last line. Lost in thought, immediately I began to evaluate myself.
Who and what do I point my finger to? For a moment I even envisioned myself, pointed finger in the air, a screwed up face of frustration. In a flash I thought of my husband.
Yes, I am guilty of pointing the finger at my husband. Talking at him not with him when I am hurt or angry. I’ve been stripped raw. I have walls. I wear my heart on my sleeve. I say it how I think it is at the time. In the heat of the moment. I’ve also been working on this!
I reflected our recent disagreements. A moment where I had shamefully “pointed the finger” instead of collecting my own thoughts first. If I was to honestly break each issue down the the very root, although in many instances my concern was warranted, the bigger issue was within me and how I would let my own doubts and insecurities manifest and feed my emotions.
Now, I can see how I was actually more pissed off with how I was left to feel than anything he had actually done!
The more to look at other circumstances and began to break things down, I couldn’t believe it. Each and every single time I had pointed my finger at someone else, the true real issue was somewhere deep inside of me.
So today I have come to learn, I need to stop, be present. To know its ok to feel emotions but to look inside and truly understand where that stem of emotion is really coming from and work with it. To remember that people are going to make mistakes. But that’s all theirs and not mine. How I react and let those reactions feed my own emotions IS all mine.
And when pointing the finger at others really looking at why their actions are bothering me.
What are your thoughts? Are you to guilty of pointing the finger with three fingers pointing straight back?
Image credit - https://pixabay.com/en/hand-finger-pointing-pointing-1923005/