A very common human habit, which people do even subconsciously is to point out or notice weakness in others. For example, it is easy to notice when someone behaves badly, when they speak wrongly, and even when they make mistakes. But when it comes to examining oneself with the same level of honesty, they will begin to give excuses or give exemptions. This is why true growth is not attained by criticising others, but by the courage to look inwards. You start to grow when you focus on yourself rather than being distracted by constantly looking at the flaws in others. Remember that you are not without flaw, so focus on your own first.
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While I was in secondary school many years ago, there was something I witnessed. There was this student who was in my class then who always laughed at other students when they make mistakes or when they give wrong answers. He often said that they were not serious. Then one day came when the teacher came to the class, and in the course of the teaching, he asked the student a question and he got it wrong, but others actually knew the answer. It was at this point that he realised that he has not been studying his books as he thought. Then he began to take his studies seriously instead of mocking others for their mistakes, and he improved. He moved from criticising others to correcting himself, and that was when he got better.
Seeing flaws in others is actually very easy because it requires little effort. It also creates a sense of superiority, and makes you to feel better about yourself without needing to improve. When you constantly focus on the flaws of other people, you will distract yourself from seeing the areas about your life that needs urgent attention. Imagine pointing out the "log" in the eyes of of someone else, yet you fail to see the "speck" in your own eyes. Always focusing on the imperfections of others, over time, can stunt your own growth, because you will begin to see yourself as without flaw, and you will not see the reasons to improve. It will also damage your relationship with other people, because no one will like to be constantly judged.
Recognising your own flaws requires maturity, humility, and a level of Internal strength. It is not usually easy to admit when you are wrong or when you need to improve. It also requires you to remove pride and come to terms with the uncomfortable truth about yourself. This is actually the start of true transformation. Self-awareness is the foundation of true transformation. When you understand your weaknesses and your flaws, you will be better positioned to work on yourself and improve on the weaknesses. By that, you will become a better version of yourself.
You also have to understand that everyone is a "work in progress." So you do not have to expect them to be perfect or to be without flaws. The same way you have your flaws, others have theirs too. So instead of being too quick to judge people based on their flaws, it will be better to choose empathy. By choosing empathy, you will also build a better relationship with people. More so, you will also learn from them and from their own experiences.
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One of the things that I have also noticed about self-awareness is that it makes you more accountable. When you take responsibilities for your actions instead of putting the blame on others, you will tend to gain more control over your life. If you start trading blames, it will keep you stuck, and make you less accountable. But when you acknowledge your errors, it makes you to avoid future occurrence of the same error, and will also make you to learn from it. In the long run, you will become more confident, more responsible, and a better human.
In this era where criticisms are becoming too common, having self-reflection is rare and priceless. Looking inwards is what sets you apart. It also shows that you are not just interested in being right, but you want to become a better person. This is actually the true mark of maturity.
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