I am a woman and you will soon realize why this is my opening statement.
My second statement? These words are mine and mine alone.
INTRODUCTION
I once listened in on a show and a report was read out about women and it was realized that while as young ladies, they are mainly focused and studious than the moment they hit puberty and start getting aware of the attention from men, they tend to downplay their intelligence and soon they drop from the top to average, sometimes lower.
The report didn't tell the story of every lady, but it was a familiar story which I saw happen in the lives of many ladies I knew and know. I am also talking about what I saw in my life.
Many times, a lady lives her life in comparison with that of a man or lives it because of or dependant on that of a man and I think that is the root of many of our problems, including those which started most of the feminist movements we have today.
NO FEMINIST
I am no feminist at least not with the actions most of them portray. Going by the definition of feminism by Collins Dictionary
Feminism is the belief and aims that women should have the same rights, power, and opportunities as men.
I don't think it is a physical battle which is fought by politics and movements and what is not. I am not even sure I think that there's supposed to be a battle at all as that is a natural given that existed even before we found ourselves on earth. We just have to live and act accordingly.
One way to define a bad writer is if he or she keeps trying to tell you instead of showing you (or so they say!)
I think the best way to tell someone something is to actually show it, and not merely say the words. So when some women 'cry'about how unfair it is that men are given more opportunities or are given preferences, I am tempted to ask if they think men will cry if the table is turned or if men cry WHEN the tables are turned, No! instead, we hear things like 'be a man', 'Stop being a baby', 'are you a woman?'
THESE WERE PLASTERED
I once read a story about Benjamin Franklin as a farmer. He wanted to prove to his neighbors how planting plaster with the seed was good for the crops, but he was disbelieved and shunned. Arguments followed his attempts to tell them and after a while, he said no more about it. Instead, the following spring he planted some grains and close to the path where people walked, he traced some letters with his finger, mixing the plaster well with the seed. As the plants grew, a deeper shade of green was seen sprouting, and the neighbors could read what he wrote:
THIS WAS PLASTERED
The words left no doubt as to the potency of the plaster.
The show, don't tell.
KNOW WHAT YOU CARRY
I love words and so I tend to pick strings of words as I journey through life, and one I picked in school was said by a friend. He said,
If you know what you carry, you won't miscarry.
I think that is self-explanatory. When you realize who you are, you can't be reduced except your mind is broken and you no longer know who you are. A knowledge of who you are determines what you accept, and if you are not treated right, you either demand it or leave.
I realized late in life that crying doesn't earn you anything but pity, and pity is not as productive as respect. If you want respect, you demand it by respecting yourself and giving people something to respect.
I'll tell you what I think about women.
I think we are stronger than men, the only area most men are better is in the are of physical strength, and if a woman trains long and hard enough she becomes just as strong. Another place where men have an advantage is that they don't bear the children, so the days of menstruation, ovulation, pregnancy, and nursing have their setbacks, but we know we always bounce back if and when we want to.
WHO WE ARE
We are women, we pick our crosses and march without asking ourselves what would have happened if we were men. We work hard, study hard and excel, not minding if some man we like will be intimidated by our success (this is the meaning of that report at the beginning of this post).
We don't ask men to treat us as we should, we act as we should and if we don't get the respect we know we have earned, we walk away (I mean we got the hotter legs anyway).
NO NEED FOR NAME CALLING
There's no need for movements, no we don't need to be called feminists before they take notice. Each woman should mentor a younger woman to be all she can be, to attain the greatest heights and if she decides to get married, she should choose a man who also sees her worth.
Let's train our daughters without the victim's mindset, let's teach them that their future still depends on what they create, be it a man's world as they claim or not, and if movements or groups are created, let it not be for us who are free, let it be for the sisters who do not know who they are. Let it be a movement for the empowerment of the mind, not one calling for recognition, Recognition is earned by making people take notice. Let us wake up their minds to the realization of who they are, of what they carry.
CONCLUSION
We are women, we are the incubators of humanity. We carry generations to come. We carry the future. We are no weaklings. We do not need to be called Feminists, no we simply need to put our feet down and show the world we rule our lives.
The mind... it starts from the mind.
I don't think it is a physical battle which is fought by politics and movements and what is not. This is battle of the mind. If you know what you carry, you won't miscarry.
This is for that woman who thinks the world is unfair because she was made a woman.
Create and rule your world.