Many times, there are often only two possibilities when the results do not meet our expectations. One is bad luck; the other is lack of ability. But I prefer to believe in the second one, because only in this way I can continue to improve.
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I still remember when I was in my second grade, the teacher asked us to transcribe a page full of text, he said, he will be selecting five students who have the best handwriting and put them in the school garden board.
In order to earn a spot on the board, that night, I copied the text three times. Usually, I went to bed around ten o'clock, but that day, I copied until midnight. I almost fall asleep while writing, when I yawn, I will slap myself, until I finished copying three times then only go to bed. In my mind, thinking that the teacher will select at least one of my copy.
When the teacher is examining in his office, and he called me over and said: "Your learning attitude is commendable, your handwriting is also very neat, just that in the second sentence of the third paragraph, you missed a word, if I put this out, it is obvious that the text copied by others is not the same, so no way this will be selected."
After listening to the teacher, I was very frustrated. But I can’t blame others, can only blame myself for being careless.
This is like when you produce a lot of parts, but all of them cannot meet the buyer’s requirements.
Sometimes, it seems that we have paid a lot, but when we did not meet each other requirements, we will be disqualified.
Not every hard work will have rewards. When we feel frustrated with the results, and even despair to give up, first ask yourself, whether you already have the corresponding ability.
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My friend Alvin, works in the sales department.
The manager asked him to complete 20 orders a month. With Alvin’s ability, he able to complete 20 orders every month before the month ends. Other colleagues after reached their quota, they will sit in the office to chat, only Alvin, even after reaching the quota, but still continue to complete more orders.
I don’t understand, and asked Alvin: "Why do you work so hard?" The boss is not going to pay you more for your extra orders. Isn’t it better to stay in the office and enjoy the cold environment under this hot day? ”
Alvin did not answer my question directly, but asked me: "Do you know why in the state-owned enterprises, most people are just chatting, lack of discipline, and those who start a business, almost all are working hard?"
I did not answer, Alvin continued: "Because those in state-owned enterprises, always think that they are working for others, no matter how much the company earned, and they do not have any relationship with the company, and their wages will not rise. And those who started a business, are considered to work for themselves, if they make achievements, they are the biggest beneficiaries.”
The reason why people do not want to go out and find more customers is that they feel they are working for the company. But as long as they think about it, they will find out that they are actually working for themselves, not only can train their eloquence, but also can train their ability to improvise, and also expand their social circle. And sit in the office will get nothing. ”
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I suddenly woke up. Most of the time, we can't go on because we feel that we are working for others. If you change the concept of all the efforts as a kind of training for our ability, is to enhance our value and efforts, and also to provide a better future, we are the biggest beneficiaries of the game. Every time I think of this, this will make me continue to work hard when I’m facing trouble.
I heard such a story before.
An old man is recuperating in a small village, but there are some naughty children living nearby, they are playing with each other every day, the noise is affecting the old man unable to rest. To stop this, the old man came up with a way.
He called the children together and told them that the person who has the loudest voice, will get paid. The louder the voice, the more they were paid. He always gives different rewards according to the noise of the children. By the time the children get used to the reward, the old man begins to reduce the rewards, and in the end, the old man stops giving anything to the children.
As a result, the children think that the treatment is becoming more and more injustice, think that "if you stop paying, there is no point to make noise." And in the end, the children stopped making noises around the old man house.
In fact, the old man in the story is using extrinsic motivation.
Money is extrinsic motivation, with the extrinsic motivation, the children have the motivation to start making noises. Once the old man stops giving the children money, that is, the extrinsic motivation disappears, the children will have no motivation to make noises.
In our lives, extrinsic motivation may be a reward or a promotion of a position. If we value extrinsic motivation too much, we will put ourselves in a passive position-to work hard. When there is no extrinsic motivation, we will work in a slipshod manner. This is very detrimental to our own development.
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In contrast to extrinsic motivation, intrinsic motivation can inspire us longer.
Intrinsic motivation is to motivate yourself to work hard by setting goals to motivate your sense of achievement and career.
Most of the time, we want to give up when we are in a difficult time, often because the result is too bad and does not meet our expectation.
Spent three to four hours, wrote a thousand-words post, repeatedly revise, repeated proofread, thought that this post could get a lot of upvotes, but the result doesn’t meet your expectation, so you want to give up.
If you rely on extrinsic motivation too much, once you do not get the material return, you will always want to give up, hard to succeed.
Don't forget why you started. You do something, is not to get extrinsic motivation, but to be a better self.
Those despair day, if your ability still can't handle your ambition, please continue to hold on! Because when you do something to the extreme, everything you want will come!
