It is quite disheartening that some people's main aim of keeping friends is because of what they will gain from them and not for what they will also give to them. If you find yourself in this position, then you do not value friendship, you are only keeping them as a contingency plan or as "spare tire" for emergency. Friendship is not all about seeking for what to gain but have you also asked yourself what you will bring to the table?
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If you only remember your friends when you want something from them or when you seek for favour from them, then your friendship is not genuine and you do not value them for who they are but what you will gain from them. This is why some people will not have difficulty in making friends but the bulk of the difficulty will rest on them retaining the friends. This is because when the friends feel used, they will take a walk. If your friends have never benefited anything tangible from you, then the value you place on them is questionable.
One of the major banes of people in this era is that they love things and use people. Whereas, the normal way should be to love people and then use things. This has made them to lay less emphasis on true friendship. A true friendship is one in which each party that is involved benefits mutually and values each other, not a case where only one person is benefiting from it. When you value your friends, you will not want to exploit them for your selfish reasons.
You do not have to wait to get a perfect friend for you to value them. Obviously, every friend has their own flaws and they are not perfect, but you need to value them nonetheless. Even you yourself are not perfect, so it will be absurd to expect perfection from someone else. More so, have you also fulfilled your own requirements before you look for someone else to fulfil them? This is why you should not allow the sight of flaws to becloud your reasoning of valuing your friends.
What you should also know is that the value you place on people will tell how you relate with them. For example, if you do not regard your friends, you will have the tendency of treating them with ill attitude and when they can't take your ill attitude, they will take a walk. You should learn to value and respect people because it is with the same respect you give them that they will return to you too. If you want respect and value from your friends, you should also value and respect them.
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Things that matter: For example, showing appreciation. The little "thank you" you tell someone is worth a bunch to that person. Obviously, you should realize that the favours your friends give to you are not merited, so you are not entitled to them, they are solely privileges.
Furthermore, you should also use the word "please" when seeking for favour and whatnot. More so, "I am sorry" should also come in handy when you feel you have erred against your friends. All these will let them know that you regard them and that you value them. In summary, you should have this popular statement at the back of your mind:
Treat your friends the way you want them to treat you.
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