No one is born with boundless self-assurance. If someone seems to have inconceivable self-assurance, this is on account of he or she has taken a shot at building it for quite a long time. Self-assurance is something that you figure out how to develop on the grounds that the testing universe of business, and life by and large, can flatten it.
Low self-esteem is like driving through life with your hand brake on
On top of this, we have to deal with our inner critic of self-doubt that constantly tells us that we are not good enough. When bombarded by so many elements that threaten our self-confidence, we need to take charge of building it up for ourselves.
Below are some tips to build self confidence,and hope in oneself
1•Visualize yourself as you want to be.
The design process usually starts as a fantasy, with ideas that I dream of and visualize. These ideas become a reality by bringing various ingredients together
Dare to visualize a world in which your most treasured dreams have become true.
Visualization is the technique of seeing an image of yourself that you are proud of, in your own mind. When we struggle with low self-confidence, we have a poor perception of ourselves that is often inaccurate. Practice visualizing a fantastic version of yourself, achieving your goals.
Inexperienced personal development teachers always tell you to visualize, but often in a tragically limited way. They tell you to visualize nothing but victory. But high-achievers know that it's even more important to visualize themselves at the point where they want to quit, and then see themselves working through the struggle.
The harder you work... and visualize something, the luckier you get.I think in order to accomplish anything in life, you have to visualize yourself there - accepting the award, hearing your song on the radio, whatever it is - or you lose the willpower and the drive.
The ability to collect, analyze, triangulate and visualize vast amounts of data in real time is something the human race has never had before. This new set of tools, often referred by the lofty term Big Data has begun to emerge as a new approach to addressing some of the biggest challenges facing our planet.
What the mind can conceive and believe it can achieve
2•Affirm yourself.
Affirmations are positive and uplifting statements that we say to ourselves. These are normally more effective if said out loud so that you can hear yourself say it. We tend to believe whatever we tell ourselves constantly. For example, if you hate your own physical appearance, practice saying something that you appreciate or like about yourself when you next look in the mirror
To get your brain to accept your positive statements more quickly, phrase your affirmations as questions like, “Why am I so good in making deals?” instead of “I am so good at making deals.” Our brains are biologically wired to seek answers to questions, without analyzing whether the question is valid or not.
One of the best guides to how to be self-loving is to give ourselves the love we are often dreaming about receiving from others. There was a time when I felt lousy about my over-forty body, saw myself as too fat, too this, or too that. Yet I fantasized about finding a lover who would give me the gift of being loved as I am. It is silly, isn't it, that I would dream of someone else offering to me the acceptance and affirmation I was withholding from myself. This was a moment when the maxim "You can never love anybody if you are unable to love yourself" made clear sense. And I add, "Do not expect to receive the love from someone else you do not give yourself
There is no affirmation without the one who affirms. in this sense, everything to which you grant your love is yours
3•Do one thing that scares you every day.
To achieve personal growth it is sometimes necessary to move outside of a comfort zone. Unjustified fears can constrain exploration and positive development. Here is a saying I find valuable.......
Do one thing every day that scares you.
The above advice is typically attributed to Eleanor Roosevelt who was First Lady for many years and a noted social activist.
Don’t be reckless with other people’s hearts. Don’t put up with people who are reckless with yours.Don’t waste your time on jealousy. Sometimes you’re ahead, sometimes you’re behind. The race is long and, in the end, it’s only with yourself.
To do what you are afraid to do is to guide your life by fear. How much better not to be afraid to do what you believe in doing!
Be true to your own act, and congratulate yourself if you have done something strange and extravagant, and broken the monotony of a decorous age. It was a high counsel that I once heard given to a young person, “Always do what you are afraid to do........Every day you are placed in some situation that definitely tests you. It requires courage to practice patiently in spite of discouragement until you have acquired proper form in swimming, life saving, or some other activity. Almost every step of progress that you make will be in the face of difficulty and discouragement. But don’t let it beat you! Always do what you are afraid to do.
You gain strength, courage, and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face.
You are able to say to yourself, “I lived through this horror. I can take the next thing that comes along.”
The danger lies in refusing to face the fear, in not daring to come to grips with it. If you fail anywhere along the line it will take away your confidence. You must make yourself succeed every time. You must do the thing you think you cannot do.
“If you are insecure, guess what? The rest of the world is too. Do not overestimate the competition and underestimate yourself. You are better than you think.”
The best way to overcome fear is to face it head-on. By doing something that scares you every day and gaining confidence from every experience, you will see your self-confidence soar. So, get out of your comfort zone and face your fears!!!!
4•Question your inner critic.
Remember, you have been criticizing yourself for years and it hasn’t worked. Try approving of yourself and see what happens.We are never so much disposed to quarrel with others as when we are dissatisfied with ourselves.
The critical voices in our own heads are far more vicious than what we might hear from the outside. Our "inside critics" have intimate knowledge of us and can zero in on our weakest spots.
You might be told by the critics that you're too fat, too old, too young, not intelligent enough, a quitter, not logical, prone to try too many things...
It's all balderdash!
Some elements of these may be true, and it's completely up to you how they affect you. Inside critics are really just trying to protect you. You can:
Some of the harshest comments that we get come from ourselves, via the "voice of the inner critic." If you struggle with low self-confidence, there is a possibility that your inner critic has become overactive and inaccurate
Everyone has things they don't like about themselves. No one is perfect. Learn to work with yourself and not against yourself. Learn to work with the parts of yourself you don't like as much. Try to direct your behavior so that it can serve you somehow. Awareness and honesty are great tools for learning to work with yourself. Remember, self-criticism is not helpful if it's not constructive. You can examine your behaviors in an effort to change them, but leave out the judgment.
Find opportunities to congratulate, compliment and reward yourself, even for the smallest successes
5•Take the 100 days of rejection challenge
We've all been stung by the sound of NO. We've all allowed ourselves to be temporarily defined by another person's decision to reject us, even when it's not personal......We all learn lessons in life. Some stick, some don't. I have always learned more from rejection and failure than from acceptance and success.
My change for today is to push myself to give the 100 day challenge a second chance. As terrifying as it may be, I know that it will get a whole lot easier after taking the first couple of steps. People say that personal growth is all about stepping outside your comfort zone, and that’s exactly what I plan to do.
Personally, I've learned about perseverance: when you hear the word 'No,' and when you hear rejection, that it's not always final. And that timing is everything, and you have to stay the course and just keep working hard and know that, when your time comes, that it will be sweet and that it will be the perfect time....You have people come into your life shockingly and surprisingly. You have losses that you never thought you'd experience. You have rejection and you have learn how to deal with that and how to get up the next day and go on with it.
6•Set yourself up to win.
The price of success is hard work, dedication to the job at hand, and the determination that whether we win or lose, we have applied the best of ourselves to the task at hand....The will to win, the desire to succeed, the urge to reach your full potential... these are the keys that will unlock the door to personal excellence.....
Yesterday is not ours to recover, but tomorrow is ours to win or lose.
Never give up, and be confident in what you do. There may be tough times, but the difficulties which you face will make you more determined to achieve your objectives and to win against all the odds.
You were born to win, but to be a winner, you must plan to win, prepare to win, and expect to win.
Inside each of us, there is the seed of both good and evil. It's a constant struggle as to which one will win. And one cannot exist without the other.
Champions are not the ones who always win races - champions are the ones who get out there and try. And try harder the next time. And even harder the next time. 'Champion' is a state of mind. They are devoted. They compete to best themselves as much if not more than they compete to best others. Champions are not just athletes.
To establish true self-confidence, we must concentrate on our successes and forget about the failures and the negatives in our lives.
Too many people are discouraged about their abilities because they set themselves goals that are too difficult to achieve. Start by setting yourself small goals that you can win easily.Once you have built a stream of successes that make you feel good about yourself, you can then move on to harder goals. Make sure that you also keep a list of all your achievements, both large and small, to remind yourself of the times that you have done well.
Instead of focusing only on “to-do" lists, I like to spend time reflecting on “did-it" lists. Reflecting on the major milestones, projects and goals you’ve achieved is a great way to reinforce confidence in your skills.
7•Help someone else.
The purpose of life is not to be happy. It is to be useful, to be honorable, to be compassionate, to have it make some difference that you have lived and lived well.The best way to not feel hopeless is to get up and do something. Don’t wait for good things to happen to you. If you go out and make some good things happen, you will fill the world with hope, you will fill yourself with hope
No one is useless in this world who lightens the burdens of another.
The best antidote I know for worry is work. The best cure for weariness is the challenge of helping someone who is even more tired. One of the great ironies of life is this: He or she who serves almost always benefits more than he or she who is served.....Love is not patronizing and charity isn't about pity, it is about love. Charity and love are the same -- with charity you give love, so don't just give money but reach out your hand instead.
Helping someone else often enables us to forget about ourselves and to feel grateful for what we have. It also feels good when you are able to make a difference for someone else.
Instead of focusing on your own weaknesses, volunteer to mentor, practically assist or teach another, and you'll see your self-confidence grow automatically in the process...
8•Care for yourself.
Self-care. It is an important topic most people do not spend enough time thinking about.
You may be the most “put together" and “with it" person for miles around, But that doesn’t mean you don’t need some self care. It probably means you are already, giving yourself your needed self care and that is why you are so able to project so much awesomeness every day.
Self care should always come first, but don’t let this lead you to thinking that self-care is “selfish"...
Knowing how to be solitary is central to the art of loving. When we can be alone, we can be with others without using them as a means of escape
don't realise they're self-harming. The phrase 'self-harm' brings up thoughts of 'cutting', but that's only a small portion of it. When you drink excessively to drown your sorrows to the point you throw up and can't see straight and/or, like a girl at my school, ended up being driven to hospital to have her stomach pumped, you've brought harm to yourself. If you take drugs to feel numb and it becomes an addiction that you can't break, you've self-harmed. When you starve yourself or binge eat to fit the latest fashions, you're pushing your body further than it can go.
We need to start treating ourselves how we deserve to be treated, even if you feel that no one else does. Prove to the world you ARE worth something by treating yourself with the utmost respect and hope that other people will follow your example. And even if they don't, at least one person in the world is treating you well: YOU.
Self-care is never a selfish act -- it is simply good stewardship of the only gift I have, the gift I was put on earth to offer to others...
Make time to cultivate great exercise, eating and sleep habits. In addition, dress the way you want to feel. You have heard the saying that “clothes make the man.” Build your self-confidence by making the effort to look after your own needs.
9•Create personal boundaries
Setting boundaries is a way of caring for myself. It doesn’t make me mean, selfish, or uncaring (just) because I don’t do things your way. I care about me, too...
Lack of boundaries invites lack of respect
The boundary to what we can accept is the boundary to our freedom.
When we fail to set boundaries and hold people accountable, we feel used and mistreated.....Setting boundaries is a way of caring for myself. It doesn’t make me mean, selfish, or uncaring (just) because I don’t do things your way. I care about me, too.
Boundary setting is really a huge part of time management
Learn to say no. Teach others to respect your personal boundaries. If necessary, take classes on how to be more assertive and learn to ask for what you want. The more control and say that you have over your own life, the greater will be your self-confidence...
Never be bullied into silence. Never allow yourself to be made a victim. Accept no one’s definition of your life, but define yourself
10•Shift to an equality mentality
looking at them at what point they congealed into their final selves. It might be a very nice self, but you know you can expect no more suprises from it. Whereas, the other kind keep moving, changing... They are fluid. They keep moving forward and making new trysts with life, and the motion of it keeps them young. In my opinion, they are the only people who are still alive. You must be constantly on your guard against congealing.
It is easier for one to take risks and to chase his dreams with a mindset that he has nothing to lose. In this lies the immense passion, the great advantage of avoiding a materialistic, pleasure-filled way of life...
It's a funny thing about life, once you begin to take note of the things you are grateful for, you begin to lose sight of the things that you lack.
People with low self-confidence see others as better or more deserving than themselves. Instead of carrying this perception, see yourself as being equal to everyone. They are no better or more deserving than you. Make a mental shift to an equality mentality and you will automatically see an improvement in your self-confidence.
Wanting to be someone else is a waste of the person you are