My husband decided to divorce, because he no longer sees me in his future. And I do not see anyone except him.
Together 4 years, two and a half in a relationship and a half in marriage. And somehow recently, everything has become more acute, frequent quarrels, scandals, complete inattention to me and "your work is garbage, I'm making money here," insults from him, and then with mine, I'm in tears.
I stopped feeling necessary and, too, in response to the time, stopped caring and allowed myself to talk about it unflatteringly. As a result, a quarrel over a trifle and he begged me to leave with tears in his eyes, periodically saying muck. My nerves passed, and I listened to it. A couple of days I tried to make up, but he decided everything for himself, and does not want to return anything. I also decided that everything, since he so easily refuses, I also did not need anything, I held on, and then all the same I broke down, wrote, persuaded to reconcile.
About a month we did not really communicate, only I wrote tearful sms, to which he did not answer. Hope began to fade. Then, thanks to his mother, we met and I tried to talk to him, he did not want to, he said that he does not like that he does not see me anymore in his life, and he was filled with tears. The conversation did not end with anything. I left and a couple of weeks later I came to his house on his birthday, he was alone, he did not intend to mark. I just congratulated you with words, hugged, he offered tea, tried to talk. He says with pain in his voice that this is the point and so it will be better.
We sat in the evening until evening, he said that I'm good and I'll find better, then I started to kiss and get back, with the words that it's wrong. And he convinced himself more than me. We did not come to that day because he did not want to talk about us, he just wanted to be together on that day and not spoil him. Just sat in an embrace until the night, periodically something to each other speaking. But there was a moment that he stroked my hair, hugged me tight, said that I was very beautiful and that I would find him better, kissed his forehead and his tears rolled down. I feel that he still loves me, but he got himself into the head that he actually spoils my life. He said that he can not and does not want to torment me any more and it's better to finish everything like this now than when the children go.
I do not understand what's going on. The option of betrayal and the fact that he fell out of love, is precisely swept aside. He also said that he does not want to spoil my life as his father spoiled my mother. And this idea is very deep in him, since there were nuances and he recently behaved very similarly. And I saw that he was trying to change, and then broke. And he said that he understands that my is not always normal behavior, it's just a reaction to what he did.
How to be I do not know, it's very hard for me to let go, I cry every day, constantly scrolling all this in my head, I do not eat, I do not sleep, I drink soothing. I want to return our family, but I have no idea how this is possible. In fact, we broke up at the moment of grinding, a common life, which we were just starting to line up. We parted loving, but he rested and did not want to return anything. And we will soon have an anniversary, it would be exactly 4 years, and it finishes me.