Welcome fans to the weekly spectacle, where we dish the dirt on all your favourite neoxian city dwellers. We're a weekly paper, so be sure to note that these are events that have happened over the last week in our awesome city! We're also looking for stories, and we'll pay neoxag for every one of them that we publish.

Happy reading.

Splinterlands to relocate their main office to somewhere more fitting.

Splinterlands has made headlines this week by moving their brand new untamed offices into Neoxian City. Their main office will be located in citizen Hive account@zaku's bedroom where the main bulk of the buying and selling happens. One of our reporters asked Hive account@aggroed for comment:

We did think about renaming splinterlands to zakulands since most of the activity is from Hive account@zaku anyway, but we thought that would isolate other players that are already heavily invested in it. In the end we just relocated to his bedroom and that would save on all those server requests from him, killing two birds with one stone.

A splinterlands official stated that the move to neoxian city was a healthy decision

Citizen Xawi wins innocence of the year award

Hive account@xawi, most famed for her naive innocence, an innocence that can only be matched by that of a biblical angel, has been awarded innocence of the year award. The reward ceremony will be held at neoxian square, and will be presented to her by her biggest fan, Hive account@reazuliqbal.

Her most notable moments can be seen on discord for:

• Pretending to not get the double meanings

Tickets for this event will be sold by Hive account@raymondspeaks and can be bought for 10000 neoxag each.

Breeze lives up to her citizenship

New citizen Hive account@breeze, most noted for her star radio show on palnet discord, and also the Steemit SA server, lives up to her citizenship name by always breezing past. If you're not quick enough you'll miss her. 

Earning the nickname speedy gonzales, breeze is to start up the very first radio show on Neoxian city, and you better be quick -- or you'll miss it!

Double Bear and Just Nouks lower the tone once again

In a shock collision by two people that aren't really supposed to be near each other at the same time, and Neoxian city officials try very hard to keep apart, collided a few days ago. They have spent the last two-three evenings spanking each other, talking dirty and trying to break the celestial innocence of Hive account@xawi, and Hive account@raymondspeaks.

Onlookers have been traumatized. One young man commented:

It was crazy; there we were, all talking about regular family stuff, cars, the price of neoxag, and so on, and in comes Hive account@bearbear613 and Hive account@anouk.nox and it just all went downwards after that.

There have been reports that Hive account@woot-zi ran home to his mummy he was that scared

Citizen Hive account@gerber pledges to build no more 1 mile high pyramids that break our f*king server

Citizen Hive account@gerber made a public apology last week for building a one mile high neoxian cube pyramid that broke our server. Instead, he pledged to create massive holes underground to compensate for his building fetish. 

Who needs 1 mile high pyramids anyway, when I can create 1 mile deep holes instead, yay!

And finally, in lighter news, Hive account@axeman turns Intersectional Feminist

Hive account@axeman shocked punters last week by claiming that he had seen the light and was now an intersectional feminist, and that he now finally understood how women feel.

Shocked and confused our reporters on the ground asked him for comment:

Well, you know, I understand it all now. It must be hard for them getting up in the morning, trying to look as good as they do, and then come in to be photographed by me. It must be really hard for them. I'm going to try and be a good ally by giving them all a chance at getting photographed naked

We tried to explain to Hive account@axeman that this really wasn't being a Feminist but he told us to "sshhh" and then winked.

We have no comment to that.