I have no musical skills at all. Like most kids at school, I learned to play "Twinkle, twinkle little star" on the Violin. Then attempted to play the trumpet for a while and knew how to play that tune on a piano with a fist rolling from side to side.

I, along with the whole of my primary school, appeared in a BBC film. Ralph McTell had a hit song, "Streets of London"; we all had to prance around in a giant human spiral while they filmed it from a camera on a giant crane over the top of the school. A guy on Facebook says he has a copy of the film, but numerous requests from me and other former pupils have fallen on deaf ears.

I did make a record, though, in the 70s. A kid at my secondary school, whose dad was a sound engineer at a recording studio, wanted some kids as backing singers. This was around the time that such glorious songs as "Grandad, we love you," and "There's no one quite like grandma" were trailblazing the music industry.

I can even remember some of the lyrics forty-plus years on!

"...... Isn't she lovely, hasn't he grown. Is it a year? I can't believe how time has flown."

In the words of David Bowie: "I never wanted to be a rock star."