So there I was trying to relax, minding my own business when my sandwich tried to kill me!!!
A stupid piece of my stupid sandwich jumped down my windpipe!
How rude!!!
So, I started choking....and dying!!!
The cats freaked out and started running all throughout the house.....the sandwich went flying through the air...at least 30 seconds of my life flashed before my eyes...it was complete mayhem!
I went running into the room where The Shane was. He ran toward me....swung me around...wrapped his arms around me....gave me the Heimlich Maneuver.....and cracked my ribs!!!
The Shane saved my life! (Yay!!!!!)
The Shane cracked my ribs in the process! (Booooo!!!)
It was a strange moment of intense relief from no longer choking whilst simultaneously experiencing intense pain.
It was....
Glorious.
I think the worst part about this whole thing is that I was only halfway through this delicious sandwich when it turned on me and decided to end me!
And I kinda lost my appetite after almost dying.
Anyhoo.....
I am immensely grateful for The Shane saving my life.
I was in pretty severe pain for a few days, but each day seems to be getting better.
In closing....
One of my favorite memes.....which seems to sum up my life fairly accurately lately.
