I am a father of two boys, ages 4 and 21 months. Parenting has been both a tremendous pleasure and a tremendous challenge for me, so I'd like to share the best of what has worked well for me.
A couple of notes before I begin today:
- I intend these posts to be a series of sorts. I have quite a few topics planned for the weeks ahead, and am hoping to brainstorm even more as my life with kids unfolds naturally. If you missed my first post, check here.
- The timing of the posts may not be totally consistent, but I am hoping to post about once a week.
- By having the word “Dad” in the title, I do not mean to imply that the advice is intended only for dads. Nor do I want to imply that I came up with all these techniques myself, as my loving wife can attest to!
Now, onto the topic at hand...
Simple Strategy #2
TOY ROTATION
Constantly feel like toys are taking over every room in your house or apartment? You're probably not alone - many households can be overwhelmed by toys, especially right after a birthday, the holidays, or a visit from an over-eager grandparent. Our house definitely can feel very cluttered at times, and we even have requested “no gifts please” at some of our kids’ birthday parties (opting instead for something like a book swap) to avoid an avalanche of toys all at once.
Toy rotation is a tactic that has worked really well for us. It can help you reduce clutter, teach your kids to appreciate each toy more, and even save you money!
HOW DOES IT WORK?
Occasionally put some toys out of sight, especially ones that have been out for a while and may have "play fatigue." That's it. Just put some toys away. And a few weeks later, bring them back out, while picking out a few other toys to put away.
I have read about this in a few different places, but have yet to meet anyone that actually implements it. Why is it so underused? I think most parents who hear about it, just feel too overwhelmed by the whole process to take any action. And if you read (well-meaning) websites like the ones below, it definitely seems like a lot of planning, organizing, and maintaining is involved. Not exactly a cruise control strategy.
The Art of Toy Rotation
Toy Rotation Step-by-Step Guide
(I don’t mean to downplay the articles I listed. For people that can implement a more complex system in their life without too much stress, I feel like it would be very effective - in fact, I would be jealous of them!)
SIMPLE STEPS
The benefits have always seemed obvious to me, but at first I was one of those who thought it would just require too much effort. So what I would suggest (and has worked for us), is to start by simply putting two toys away. That's it. Choose two, and put them out of sight (or fill a medium size box with smaller toys). Then, after a few days, put another two away. Continue every few days until you feel that there is an appropriate amount of toys left. Now the hard part's done.
Now simply take the toys back out whenever you feel is right. Maybe you randomly remember one day that the wooden block set has been put away awhile, so you take that one back out. And every time you take a toy or two out, choose another toy or two to put away. Now you're on cruise control.
Remember, it doesn’t have to be an exact science. At first, I had a grand plan to have specific toys for each day of the week, or for different weeks of the month. But that would have required a fair amount of planning and energy, which might have undermined the whole experiment if it prevented me from even starting. In my experience, you can achieve most of the benefit without any need for categorizing, record keeping, or labeling of boxes. So it doesn’t have to be a consistent time period, but we have found the sweet spot to be anywhere from 2 weeks to 1 month for a cycle for any particular toy.
MINI FAQ
What if they protest when you take toys away?
In this case I have two suggestions. Either ask them to pick a few toys themselves, or pick a few yourself after they go to bed. In my experience in the latter case, 95% of the time they won’t even notice in the morning. Also, a perfect time to rotate is when they get new toys from a birthday or holiday (they are more than willing to cooperate).What if they ask to bring specific toys back out?
Great! This means that the system is working. Absence has indeed made the heart grow fonder. And it's a great time to ask them to pick a toy (or two) to put away, before bringing the "old" toy out. The only time I would deny them is if we had just put the toy away less than a week ago. In that case, I would simply tell them that they can bring it out the next week, and maybe even build some anticipation in the process.
SUMMARY
Keeping the system simple like this greatly lowers the effort involved. And I feel more than compensated for the effort, by the happiness I feel when we take old toys back out - happiness from seeing the joy on their faces that is typically associated with brand new toys, and from the satisfaction that I created that joy without further spoiling them.
Upsides
- Teaches appreciation for what they have
- Reduces clutter
- Creates "new toy" excitement all the time
- Avoids over-stimulation
- Saves money
- Can spark creativity, as they are “forced” to revisit some simpler toys
Downsides
- Need out of the way storage space (I use a closet in my finished basement)
- Does require a little effort from the parents to get the process going
The result: bliss and happiness for all (I wish my house actually looked like this).
)On the next post, I will be talking about one of the most controversial topics involving babies today.
Good luck out there!