The flooding disaster in our town has started to die down as the water recedes. The town is no longer divided by water, and traveling is back to normal, but so many are still displaced and struggling in the aftermath.
The night before last, I went to the gym and a lady in the locker room struck up a conversation with me as I was dressing after a shower.
"Have you ever lived through anything like this?" She inquired.
"I'm sorry?" I asked.
"The flooding. Have you ever lived through anything like that in the past?"
I said no. I had, but not in the same way. When I was entering my freshman year in high school, it rained in my hometown area for an entire month. The nearest city was flooded as bad or worse than what we experienced here where I live now, but I wasn't personally affected any more than my parents needing to dig a new well because my town was landlocked and had ground flooding, but we were still able to travel and live with no major damage. So yes and no, I have and yet have not lived through anything like it before.
"I haven't either," she said. "It's pretty insane. Did you have any flooding in your home?"
"Our basement flooded from the rain, but not from the rivers or lake," I answered as I sat to put my shoes on. "Luckily we got it cleaned up before we lost power. Lost quite a bit of stuff in the basement."
"Same with us. My kids were so upset," she shook her head.
The kids. Of course.
My own children hadn't seen the worst of our basement, as we didn't want them down there while cleaning. Our kids didn't see the raging flood water in town because we live just outside of town. We couldn't get out right away and while my husband and I were stressed and upset and frustrated and worried, our children were whiny and impatient with delays and not being able to do anything.
After the rivers had crested, we were able to get into town a little ways so I took the children to town to park where it was safe and walk around some of the flooded areas (from a safe distance back,) and saw many other families doing the same. I showed them how high the water was by them seeing familiar landmarks covered with water, showed them the National Guardsmen who were blocking roads and bridges. I explained that it wasn't safe and that because our town was effectively split into two, we couldn't go anywhere. All the roads around us leading from our home (they had seen by that point,) were under water both standing (in some places,) and rushing in others.
I had never experienced the helplessness of feeling trapped in my own neighborhood. Of the uncertainty of when we would have electricity and running water again. The uncertainty of being able to get to the grocery store or buy gas or even shower... needing to conserve water. It was new to me as a full grown adult. And the guilt of knowing that while we had it bad, others had it much worse.
Meanwhile, I was processing my feelings and thoughts about all this, I found myself to be annoyed with my childrens' seemingly endless whining and complaining about it all. It wasn't until I spoke with the lady briefly at the gym the night before last - my children had never experienced anything like it before, either. They were feeling and experiencing the same fears and worries as me, but couldn't articulate it. They lacked the depth of understanding... why it was unsafe and why the water just didn't go down immediately and why they couldn't go anywhere. In my own stress, I neglected to think of their stress. Of course they would have the same or similar fears. I can't believe I didn't think of it during the flood.
Now, armed with this knowledge and realization, I can help them process better in the future. I'll be better prepared for not only handling disaster, but helping my children handle it and process the situation instead of being frustrated for their lack of understanding.