The year is 2018 , and as a species [dispite what the 24h outrage media will have you believe ] we have made Significant strides in our development as a species .
However , we are still influenced heavily by our primal instincts .
As tribal & social creatures , our actions and how we react to social situations and pressures , even today , can often be traced back to our primal history where we lived in tight close nit groups of less than 200 tribes people . Within the tribe , social dynamics ruled the way of life . Many evolutionary psychologists point to our tribal evolution as the reasoning and explanation for the powerful pull and influences for things from Mob mentality to peer pressure , Fear of missing out and the fear of what others might think .
Many of us are crippled by our fear of failure and how others might view us in the aftermath of such defeat . How with our position on the societal totem pole be effected , how will my social circle react , what about the uncle I see once a year at thanksgiving , Will they think I'm a loser ?
Humans are a species that are wired for pessimism , we are quicker to see the problems , the obstacle rather than the opportunities that a change may offer . This has been demonstrated time and time again .
We often sit and forebode and plan everything that could possibly go wrong , rather than actually take that initial first step . When working on a personal project we wait for the perfect moment , until we think of evevrything and anything that could go wrong , rather than developing a plan and stress testing it .
In the book 'Unbeatable Mind' by former Navy Seal Mark Devine , the author discusses a wide variety of topics regarding lessons he has taken from his military ,business and personal life and his personal approach to integral personal development training . Although I highly recommend the book , especially for any young men struggling to find their place or purpose in the world , there was one concept that has been integral to everything I had done , set about doing and have achieved over the last 6 months since deciding to quit my old job .
The concept was 'Failing forward '
Mark puts forth his own ,rather stoic , philosophy toward failure explaining that , If we set down a path of achieving something and hit a road block and 'Fail ' we have merely tested one option and gained crucial feedback to go about succeeding in the mission on the next round .
To use an analogy , Imagine you and a friend were about to run an challenge race with walls to climb , hurdles to jump and a whole host of other obstacles to overcome . However , you had not briefing and no idea of what challenges were featured in the race . Your friend takes the approach of planning and troubleshooting and begins to think of every possible challenge and roadblock that he could face on this journey . You on the other hand , Knowing that you can not foresee the future feel that it is best to set sail and embark on this journey and face the challenges as they arise .
Now I am not saying that planning is unnecessary , But when if you choose to take action haul as on that race , when you face a challenge and if you hit it like a wall , you can regroup and plan how to make your way over , under or through it . All while you're friend will still be sitting on the starting line thinking about the best way to prepare for challenges he has no idea if he will ever face or not .
This is most peoples attitude toward life , their best ideas remain on the shelf as they slog away doing on an unfulfilling path which they promise themselves they will 'some day ' leave behind to make that dream a reality .
Action my friends , take motherfucking actions .
Failure is an indicator , it is valuable feedback . the only difference between the successful and the unsuccessful is failure , and the successful have it on their record in abundance , they have tested more paths , they put their ideas to the test , they embrace failure , they 'Fail forward '
I hope you all enjoyed this little stream of consciousness , I plan to be doing it more in future .
Regards ,
Matt
Better Every Day
Check out Mark Devine , his books are a great read but he is a very principles and down to earth guy , super admirable and his philosophy but also practical techniques like 'box breathing ' can really really help with anxiety
Get 'Unbeatable mind' : https://amzn.to/2HGBZba , phisical book , kindle or Free if you sign up to Audible
Marks box breathing exercise :
Mark on 'inside quest '
