A friend of mine on steemit ended a poignant response to me with this.
"Keep asking the big questions man, thinking is worth the pain"
And it really made me pause and think for a bit.. Life could have been so much easier if I just went along with the herd like most people seem to.
(Questionmark image does not belong to me I found it on google images)
But I didn't. I had a sense of right and wrong like I think we all do even if many cover it up and hide it or ignore it, and I asked questions.
If you really genuinely start to question things.. Then.. One question leads to another, and before you know it.. A whole world of almost unimaginable conspiracy, corruption and suffering awaits.
Plus.. You'll no longer be able to really relate with almost anyone. When I went down the rabbit hole, it alienated me from pretty much EVERYONE... Except those who were on a similar journey to try to understand the truth.
It's really difficult when you not only go up face to face with people who defend all this kind of nonsense to the point you rack up many death threats just for speaking out in defense of innocent people and animals..
Though, it's even more difficult when you see all those closest to you turn a blind eye to it.. You can expect there to be antagonists and opponents out there, but when you realize those closest to you don't really care much and don't support your efforts and wish you would do something "normal" with your life.. That's rough.
These are people you tend to love the most or shall I say who you've got the closest to, and.. It's like they don't even see the seriousness of the situation at all, OR.. They don't want to see it.
My guess is the latter, they have decently happy lives and they don't want to put that at risk. And lets be serious.. Going up against the most corrupt forces in the world is risky.
So.. I still have a decent relationship with most of the people who I feel like don't really care much about the broader world..
Though.. I've essentially.. Sacrificed what seems like almost everything at times for this pursuit of trying to understand life.
I often wonder... Maybe I should have just had a regular life like most everyone else.. Maybe I'd be happier if I had more people in my life who actually cared about me and supported me. Wouldn't it be nice..? I wonder what it's like.. To have a regular life..
I'll never know. I don't even know what regular or normal is anymore and.. As much as it would have been nice to have a typical sort of life.. That's not in my cards I guess.
People in my life at this point instead of saying stuff like.. "That's crazy, stop spending so much time researching that stuff", they are more in agreement with me now and they understand these things I speak of are for the most part true..
Yet.. They still mostly just pay lip service to it all and agree with my sentiments, yet never really actually do anything themselves to try to help the world in the ways that really need it.
As much as I'm discouraged and saddened on a regular basis and how I feel like I'm unable to relate well with just about almost anyone.. And as much as I deal with the stress of being attacked and even receive many death threats over the years and things like that... I still don't think I would change it and be a "normie" if I could.
I think I'd rather suffer and "know" what I know.. Than be in bliss and ignorant.
The knowledge is worth the pain in this case.
I wouldn't say EVERYTHING.. There's at least one thing I'd rather never have had to know or experience.. But for the most part.. All the pain and suffering.. It's worth it to have a better glimpse of what's really happening in the world.
Especially if one of your main goals in life is to try to help others.. Makes it much more difficult to try to help the world if you won't look at it and try to understand it and learn about it and try to see how it works.
In order for me to help the world more.. I have to look at it. I have to look at all the darkest nastiest parts. That includes footage of war, ISIS executions, animal abuse, poverty, theft, dishonesty, theft, everything.. I have to look at it all, for if I ignore it cause it HURTS too much.. How can I ever expect to help very much..?
Actually.. As an afterthought.. I'm not sure I would say that.. "It's worth it".. As if there is something redeeming about it that makes it enjoyable or fun or whatever, it's almost never enjoyable or fun.. However.. It is necessary for one who wants to try to help make things better in the world I think.
Is it worth it? I don't know.. But.. If you really care about others and the world in general.. I think you should do more than just say you care with words and actually act in your life to do things that reflect this belief that you hold. If you really want to help the world.. I think you need to ask a lot of questions and get really deep into the root of the problems... And I can't say it'll be worth it.. It might make your life a miserable living hell..
But.. To me.. I'd rather personally be aware that I'm in hell instead of trying to pretend it's not hell. I wanna try to KNOW what it's really like around me and not live in some kind of "ignorance is bliss" denial world.
If you REALLY genuinely try to learn about what's really going on in the world while listening to your heart and trying to help others. You will almost certainly be perpetually crucified by many of the very people you are trying to help.
It won't be easy, it's going to hurt a lot. You'll be tested in almost every way imaginable.. But if you can go through it all.. All the hardship and doubt and second thoughts and wishing things were different and wishing people cared more and all the abuse and betrayal and fear and uncertainty.. If you can go through all of that SHIT...
And still have a functional empathic system and still want to help others and you still haven't let it kill your heart and your sense of right and wrong.. Then that is incredibly beautiful in my opinion and there's a powerful message there.
One thing this world does is rob a lot of people of their compassion for others and it tends to do this before we even become adults for some it happens as young as our teens or earlier..
Yet.. If you can keep that compassion intact after genuinely searching for the truth and being crucified by those you're trying to help... That's amazing.. Truly.
I think a lot of people talk a lot about how divine and great they are, though.. When push comes to shove and the shadow government is looking back at them.. They say "nevermind" and take off running.
In order to keep trying to do what is right at the deeper levels I think it has to mean more to you than your own life. Your principles of right and wrong, have to mean more to you than your own life.
This doesn't meant every single person on the planet needs to be like that, but I think a big number do in the sense that they have to be willing to risk their own health and safety in order to do what is right. That's the only way I think.. That's the only way things are going to change for the better.. When a huge amount of people stop letting the fear of getting hurt or dying stop them from doing what is right.
The concepts and principles of HONOR and morality, and doing what is right have to mean more to you than your own life, and your own simple comforts and pleasures and happiness.. You have to be willing to fucking suffer.
You have to be willing to be kidnapped and taken to some underground base and tortured endlessly as long as they can medically keep you alive for becoming such a big thorn in their side. And worse.. You have to deal with the possibility they'll do that to someone you love.
And you know what..? Almost no one is willing to do that. And I don't necessarily blame them.. It's a main reason I've been hesitant to get too close to anyone especially in a romantic sense.. But.. Almost no one is willing to even inconvenience themselves a little bit, let alone risk being tortured and murdered by the most powerful people in the world.
It doesn't look good for humanity. Almost no one has the courage to risk much of anything to do what is right. Let alone their own lives. And this is how the people in power win.. By keeping people so scared and afraid of being hurt or dying or missing out on a bunch of fun and parties and happiness and pleasure, that they never truly take that extra step like they need to in order to make the difference.
Gonna end this shortly cause I know a lot of people don't like reading really long messages.
Maybe if we have a "spiritual" awakening of such nature that is widespread, where we on a large scale come to the belief or "realization" that we are all eternal, and there is no death and also that things need to change.. Then.. The corrupt powers in place will no longer have nearly as much control over us.
For how do you terrorize and threaten one who knows they cannot die? You can just terrorize and threaten this "vessel".. Or you can "try" I should say.. Though.. That vessel is not "me". I'm so much more. This body is just but one expression of an incredible multitude.
And.. If you kill me.. I'll just keep coming back. As long as there is some love left in the world/universe/existence.. I'll keep coming back.