Shower Philosophy: those times that I ruminate on deep thoughts as I scrub my balls with my manly loofah.
Our pets are like family to us. They are much like our children. Yet, it seems to me that we make great assumptions about what decisions we should make for them. We are hypocritical in our treatment of our 4 legged children. Let's compare and contrast shall we?
DECLAWING
Many people have their cats declawed. This involves taking the first knuckle of their paw off. Why do we do this? There's no real health benefit. Should your feline child get outside, it is now nearly defenseless. But more than that, it's literally a mutilating surgery sure to make their lives more uncomfortable.
I can't imagine any real reason other than to protect your home from an unruly kitten. I think this one is fairly evident. If you can't handle the claws, leave the cat in the shop. But let's play a little game.
You have a child. If you can remove their fingers, they can no longer grasp objects such as markers, tools, et cetera and thus are less capable of damaging your home. Is that an option? A valid reason for such an extreme decision? If not, then leave your fucking cat's claws alone. There are other options. Including don't have a fucking cat(or kid).
"DOCKING"
This is the process of removing the tail and/or ears of a dog. For what reason? Aesthetics. Again, this one shouldn't even need discussion, yet there are plenty of pit bulls, boxers and other pups our there with no tails or ears. All for our pleasure. If you're okay with this, well, you can kindly fuck off. But, let's play another game of comparison and watch the jimmies really get rustled.
Circumcision is the removal of the foreskin of the penis. Numerous 'reasons' for this have been put forth but the rest of the world(it's mostly an American thing to do to newborns) puts most of those reasons to rest. Hygeine, STD's, et cetera, seem to have little to no positive correlation to circumcision. Europe's cloaked penis tips don't seem to be oozing filth and disease at alarming rates despite the absolute rarity of circumcision there.
Now that we've called to question the 'medical' reasons for circumcision, let's see how it compares to 'docking'.
One of the largest deciding factors in favor of circumcision is 'to be more like his father's penis' and 'to fit in with other boys' and 'so girls don't make fun of it.'
Aesthetics. The end. It's a preferred look in America. That's it. We cut off a significant portion of a newborn's penis strictly to help them 'fit in' with his family, friends and to make it easier for him to get laid.
Speaking of getting laid...
SPAYING AND NEUTERING
Surely I can't manage to demonize this, right? Animals that have been spaid or neutered are healthier, live longer and have reduced risks of disease such as cancer! Plus, it's helping reduce the overpopulation and stray issues we have!
I am going to get a lot of hate mail, I just know it...
If you could have a promise of an increased chance of living a couple years longer than you would naturally, reduced cancer and disease risks(that may not be that high to begin with) and help with the homeless population, would you have your genitals cut off or cut out? No sex, reduced hormone production, prediliction for weight gain, reduced energy... but you're healthier and helping, right?
Alright, let's assume you're cool with that. It's your choice. But what if it isn't your choice? What if one day you go for a fun car ride, pass out, and wake up later missing something that you've had since you were born? What if you grew up like this but grew up to find out that there was no immediate reason to have your balls cut off? Your parents did it because they decided they wanted to give you a negligibly longer life and a reduced CHANCE of disease. So now you don't even know what you're missing, but you know it's something integral to existence?
There's a reason there aren't a lot of eunichs out there. Most people aren't willing to give up that part of themselves for what seems paltry in comparison to what is being lost.
Is it really ethical to decide that your pet is fine with giving up the potential for sex(a drive that is hardwired into all life) as well as their energy, their hormonal balances, et cetera, for the promise of the possibility of a little bit longer of a life(which might be unpleasant at the end to begin with) and a reduced risk of disease that may or may not be a threat to them?
"But the stray populations! Neutering my dog helps reduce that!"
Maybe. If your dog is allowed to roam free. You mean to tell me we can't take other steps to reduce the stray population? For fucks sake, we have chastity belts for humans. We really can't make a device that could, maybe, block access to your dog's genitals for sexual purposes while allowing it to piss? Well, maybe that's too much to ask. As would be not letting your pet roam free to be hurt, killed or stolen as well as to fuck strays. I suppose it's too crazy to suggest we give dogs simple vasectomies or develop a medicine that can block the necessary processes like we do with humans. I mean, who wants to have to take the time to give a pet a pill?
The truth is that your pet is likely not going to add to the stray and overpopulation problem because most pet owners don't let their animals just run around unchecked. The stray population grows from within the stray population. And it does NOTHING to reduce the problems associated with purposed overbreeding. Breeders are going to breed as many pets as they can. Why? We keep buying from them. Why? Because we can't decide to let our pets have their own kids that would then become a part of our families.
But, again, let's do a comparison.
I have a brillaint idea for how to reduce the homeless problem in our society. Castration. If we castrate enough people, especially the homeless, we'll have less children born into or to join the homeless. Too extreme? Well, I guess an animal's life and body are less their own for being 'just animals'.
Look. I'm not saying your a bad person for wanting to be a part of the solution to problems like strays and overbreeding, but chopping your dog's nads off is making little or no difference. You want to really help with those problems? Here's a few things you can do:
- Don't let your pets roam free.
- Encourage the pet industries to look for new ways to restrict pet breeding as how we do it ourselves: birth control, devices, vasectomies, et cetera.
- Rescue strays and find them good, stable homes that won't let them roam free.
- Don't buy from unethical breeders.
- Hell, don't buy from breeders at all. Your pet can have a legacy that will ensure you always have a pet and that can let others have pets as well(when the pups are old enough to go out on their own with new 'parents').
If you don't think that you would be okay with the decision you make for your pet being made for you, maybe you should ask if it is really the best decision and if the decision is really about your pet or about you.