I stole my grandma's turkey

Thanksgiving, my kind of time of year
Grandma bakes the best meals for the fam
My stomach's hunger is never in fear
When grandma's cooking is near (it's near)

But my Grandma has a bad brain
She is slowly becoming insane
Her real name is Gretel
But she thinks it is Ethel

Last time I visited her I stole some of her pills
I did it for the high
Did it for the thrills

In my state of euphoria
My world was a phantasmagoria
I saw her smile
And was envious

I tripped my grandmother down the stairs

I DID IT
IT WAS ME
SHE BROKE HER HIP
FINE WITH ME

I rand down the stairs screaming at the top of my lungs
I opened her mouth and we merged our tounges

I sprinted into the kitchen
Took the turkey
Then ran

And I never ever
ever ever
saw my grandmother
again