I know exactly what you mean. For people who seem to get called crazy so much...there seems to be a lot of rationality in the thoughts, the reasons, that lead to suicide. Maybe that's the hardest thing for onlookers to admit. These 'terrible' actions are reflective of truths in life. Not mental disease, but reality. I think depression is a true disease, but I can't deny the things in life that cause it either. Your comment means a lot. Thanks. And there is that dividing line in life, it seems, between when it was an honest option and when you've taken it off the table, and only you really know that you have, maybe it still is a temptation. But that comfort, memento mori, that's what it is. It's soothing. I keep the same. I really thought for the longest time I wouldn't make it past my 20's. 27 club, it was on my mind, every year that led up to it. I think the humor in it to me is that when you would've attempted it, or did, you hadn't seen half the shit that you would in life. Haha. You were just getting started, speaking generally, but you know the worst was yet to come. I'm sure you do get that. Live and learn, I guess. That's why old folks laugh about the blackest stuff. Been there crossed that bridge lol, long ago, they thought they wouldn't make it either, but they did.

Coming back to this, after thinking. What I left just didn't feel complete. I really do know what you mean, about hanging around for the sake of curiosity and concern for others. I agree, though, I don't understand the reactions people have to that kind of death either. It's frustrating. Anyway, I guess I just want to say I do wish you the best in coping, whatever ways you do. I don't mean it in such a bleak way like life is all that bad all the time, but I think I understand trying to live with this thing lurking in the shadows at all times. Depressing, pain, some sense of loss. Like the last thing you said. I'm not sure - what to make of any of it, the fact of it being there, the reality of coping with it, or what ways people choose to escape it. I just know it's there. Sometimes you read things and they really do make you think. This post was really touching to me. That second photo, it's like a funeral procession of complete strangers for someone they'll never know anything about except that they never made it across. A life lost, a reason to stop, possibly an act of bravery as much as an unfortunate end. Maybe someone finally found their peace, the kind they never could in life. To imagine all the thoughts people have had while crossing that gorge... <3