I plan my days
like I am packing for a short trip
that warrants a bag
just big enough
for all the essentials.
But I fill it with everything
I might
(or might not) need,
always accounting for the potentiality
of any occurrence,
for if there's space,
I might as well fill it
with something
that could be useful.
And then, I wonder if
taking two bags
would leave one too empty,
(unless I fill that too)
so I stuff to the brim
and master the art
of retrieving contents
without them causing an explosion.
Most often, I'm travelling alone,
so I cannot share the load or
give someone that extra
pair of pants or my chargers
to carry.
But I manage to fit it all in,
even if sometimes, it becomes
too heavy to carry,
and yet,
whenever I leave the house,
with my packed bag,
even if I've checked off
checklists of
checklists,
I can't shake off
the nagging suspicion
that I'm missing something
essential.