Congress votes to add expiration date to the US constitution.

Congress votes to add expiration date to the US constitution.

Washington, DC 1/14/2018

In quiet and unannounced session today, congress just put an expiration date on the Constitution of the United States of America. In a move that had surprisingly balanced support from both sides of the aisle, the as its called “Freedom 24/7/365 Act” was approved today. The act effectively dismantles the totality of all constitutional rights the people in America now enjoy.

“In these dark times we want the people to see light at the end of the tunnel. This means a fresh start and a new government,” said some old white guy in a suit. “The US constitution has been the biggest impediment to economic growth for generations. This act will ensure American businesses can stay competitive.”

“Old school government is just not working for the people the way it used to. Best to just put it in writing now, today when it matters most, that officially, the future is now the future’s problem,” said an equally asinine white guy in a suit but with a different color tie. “By signing this bill into law, the President will give future generations the chance to start from scratch, new school. It's very exciting.”

The bill now only needs the president's signature to sign into law the law that eventually and intentionally will also invalidate that signature and law. Don’t worry though. The date set for the change toward possible anarchy is December 25th, 2038.