Yesterday, Trump announced he’d be hosting a special dinner for the top holders of the $TRUMP coin—and yet, not a single right-wing outlet or influencer has said a word.
I think I know why. I’m sure we all do.
How can this be defended?
It’s like catching a murderer in 4K, grinning into the camera with the bloody knife still in hand. There’s no ambiguity. No plausible deniability. But apparently, none of that matters. Best to pretend there’s something far more urgent going on. We have pressing national issues, after all—like debunking the ten-minute space voyage Katy Perry just took with Bezos(omg what a witch!).
Did the scheme work? Of course it did.
This morning, as I write this, $TRUMP coin is up 45%.
Free money—but not clean money. Right on time for the unlocking of a new batch too.
The latest update on their website outlines two tiers for this bribery gala.
Among the plebs—the general population of not-rich-enoughs—Trump’s team has determined that only the top 25 token holders will actually get facetime with him. The others? They can watch from a distance. Maybe wave between mouthfuls of buttery lobster. Though it wouldn’t surprise me if they were served McDonald’s instead.(Trump prefers it, I'm told)
I can already hear the rebuttals, see the replies:
“So what? People are free to do whatever they want with their money!”
Yes. True. People can buy whatever they please. I’m all about personal freedoms.
I just never imagined we’d live to see the President of the United States openly auctioning off his time—like some Web3 carnival barker.
Naively, I thought we had higher standards. But alas, here we are.
Now, before you hit me with the “TDS” tag, let me leave you with a fun little legal tidbit—something to dress the conversation in its Sunday best:
The only reason the government hasn’t declared meme coins to be securities is because they supposedly have no utility. They're just collectibles.
But giving VIP access to Donnie?
Feels like utility to me.
But what do I know? I'm just using logic. Like an idiot.
Democracy isn’t about ballots anymore.
It’s about wallets.
And it’s about time we all accepted that.
MenO