Yesterday I cried. It was late at night, I had several glasses of wine and my remote control accompanied me while drifting through hours of the German TV landscape. What I saw there deeply moved me. More than I could have ever imagined. To be honest, I was not sitting on the sofa sobbing heavily, but there was a moment when I realized how images trigger emotions in me and tears started to roll down my cheeks. This is the reason I am writing these lines right now.
There was only one topic dominating the news: marriage for all and the decision of the German Bundestag to finally make same-sex marriage possible. One might discuss the reasons why the state can even play the judge on such matters at all. Or why the traditional constructed marriage is so desirable or bears values worth to protect. But the question whether same-sex love can be a reason for exclusion is something which should not be discussed at all in a democratic Europe in the 21st century. Declining the right to get married to anyone is merciless discrimination and is in my humble opinion non-negotiable. And when some country hicks cry out their homophobia into their little worlds, it is not a plausible counter-argument, but rather proof the ancient time of the cave painting is over.
I have watched many reports or background reports yesterday. Mostly I saw people who cheered, sang, danced and laid in each others arms. And Kisses, a lot of beautiful, heart-warming kisses. Two women were standing in front of the camera, laughing with shining eyes, and the one said: "for fifteen years we want to get married and always had to hear: you certainly will not. And now the time we have been fighting for, for so long arrived. This is the best day in our life." Then they embraced each other, unrestrainedly hopped and wept. Unrestrained. Just by watching this single seen, I was filled with happiness.
Also because besides the many wonderful, sensitive moments, I became aware of the self-righteous attitude of these people who drove senseless paragraphs into the hearts of loved ones for their entire lifetime. How great the pressure of suffering in reality had actually been. How absurd it is that the greatest self-evident fact to simply be able to solidify love in a symbolic act has been despised and forbidden with an almost obscene perseverance. And now that this law finally disappears in the ditch of history, an atmosphere of redemption arises as if world peace had been proclaimed.
It is hard to believe. But the story reveals in an impressive way what discrimination, stigma and oppression evokes in those suffering from it every day. In Germany, a step was taken which could not have been more obvious and overdue. Yet, it is celebrated as a milestone! We should all think about that, because it makes crystal clear how far away from actual equality our societies still are.