And I couldn't give a shit....I'm the sodding Prime Minister after all!

Right, Theresa here. First Minister of the United Kingdom, and as far as any of you lot are concerned, MY WORD IS LAW!!!! So shut the fuck up and pay attention before I decide your town is next on the ISIS false flag hit list. 

I've been on this platform for 2 days now. Two whole fucking days. And do you know what I've discovered about you? 

I'll tell you. You're mostly a bunch of sycophantic tossers all holding their hands out hoping for a few dollars from some fat bloated cunts who control all the cash.

It's basically lovely. It's like an extension of the good ol' days of the Industrial Revolution, where there were a small group of Etonians who had all the pie, and everybody else queued up for a morsel of old pastry which was so rotten even the dogs wouldn't eat it. Ah. Proper British values! 

Thinking about Downvoting me already? Good!!!! I hope you do!

Don't think for a minute that I give a flying fuck about any of you. I don't need your wanky upvotes. I'm the fucking PRIME MINISTER of BRITAIN. In fact, I will take it as a personal slight If I DON'T have a Steemit reputation of about minus 500 by the end of the day, because getting under your skin is going to be my number one priority. 

And do you know why? Because freedom of speech isn't something you plebs are entitled to. My government have worked extra-specially hard to make sure that every opinion you have can be catalogued as some sort of hate crime unless it's specifically derived from a Government info pamphlet, or printed in one my mate Rupert's papers.

So here's a few ideas for you all, things that none of you have the bollocks to say. 

Hive account@berniesanders, you like to present yourself as the champion of the rewards pool,  but basically I think you're probably a dwarven bender with a Baby Jesus Anal Plug stuck so far up your backdoors that it quacks when you walk. 

Hive account@jerrybanfield, you honestly look like you need a good meal. Perhaps go see Hive account@sneak, i'm sure he's got a few spare pies he'd be ok to share with you. And for fucks sake, please stop talking about prayer. Nobody gives a fuck especially if you've gone all venal with your dodgy upvote bots, raping the arses of the poorest people on here who just want to earn enough to buy some rice for their kids. Personally I think it's funny that such a big personality wants to get paid for using his wanky upvote machines. Proper (small c) conservatism that Jerry! 

Hive account@sweetsssj. You frankly look like you need someone to come and smash your back doors in. Someone other than your pimp that is.... If people don't realise by now that she's actually some random bird with Stockholm Syndrome who was kidnapped by Slavers and forced to sit looking vacant over random meals so they can earn money off you before they take you back to your cage, then those people have clearly got an IQ lower than their Steemit reputation. 

See guys, it's quite cathartic being able to speak your mind on here. You should try it sometime, Oh wait, you probably don't want to because you're all scared some whale is going to come and buttfuck you for your precious rewards aren't you?

And whilst you're all too scared to say what you really think, what's happening is Hive account@haejin is shooting his spoofy man paste all over your face, and you don't even realise your choking his worm for him.

Even if you haven't invested anything into the platform directly, whenever you power up, you are helping these cretins take your rewards away from you, preventing you from actually being able to do something useful to you working class slaves, like overthrowing my government. It makes me laugh my saggy tits off that you don't realise this. 

And then, when  you've done that, how about you go and find a bunch of other cunts to downvote too? You know, the sort of people who every single day are metaphorically fisting you up the Jacksy, and all you can do is squeal and say "thank you mistress, can I have another one....?"

So go on, do me a favour, prove to me that you've got some fucking spine left in you and DOWNVOTE me. Let's see you crush my reputation into the ground (the fucking British public did that quite successfully last year I might add. I'm going to nuke Liverpool for that at some point!).

Now all together now..... 

God save our gracious Queen.... God save our noble Queen... God save the Queen...

(because who wants that kiddie raping Prince Charles to be king?)