Good day Steemians! I hope you are having a great day today!
I’m back with this second part of ”Looking Things Positively” which aims to provide reasons to be happy amidst all the negativities happening in our surroundings. I am speaking from my heart that’s why I am hoping that I may be able to touch your hearts.
In this second part, I will be talking about possible ways on how to look at failures positively.
YOU ARE A FAILURE!
- You have courted someone who you think that will complete you but still you failed to get him/her.
- You thought you’ve done your very best in your favourite subject but still, you failed.
- You have applied for different jobs but still nobody accepts you, still you failed.
- You are hired in your first job but you are fired after months of service, you failed.
- You have a job which you think that can help your family but later on it never satisfies them and now you think you failed.
- You thought you can be a good father or mother but suddenly your family went broken and realized that you still fail.
Until one day you have realized that your life is falling down and you are so drowned by failures and you’re thinking that your life is a failure and you yourself is a failure.
STOP! You are NOT A FAILURE!
Yes, you failed but that doesn’t mean that you don’t have the second chance to prove your worth or the second chance to do better. Yes, you failed in courting someone but that doesn’t mean that you don’t deserve the one that is better for you. Yes, you failed in your favourite subject which you have given so much time and effort but that doesn’t mean you don’t deserve a second chance (failing a subject has many factors though). Yes, you failed in looking for a job that will accept you but it doesn’t mean that no one will accept you forever: I know there are still companies who need you. Yes, you failed with your first job but that doesn’t mean you will never succeed in your second job or may be in your real passion. Yes, you failed in your family but that doesn’t mean you don’t have a chance to mend the situation and bring back the family that you’ve wanted.
There may be hundreds of reasons for us to fall down after every failure but there are more than thousands of reasons for us to stand up again.
Failure may be defined as unsuccessful of undertakings and being unable to meet the standards but TRUE SUCCESS can always be defined by you yourself because true success cannot be measured by any standards set by human beings.
Let us say for example:
Mr. A is a lawyer and a doctor by profession he has helped many people because of these professions. He was a beggar at 10 until one opportunity knocked in his life. He then became a scholar with full free tuition on a certain school until he reached what he has right now. He is so much thankful to the people behind his success that is why he is giving back all the blessings to the less fortunate people. He already helped thousands of beggars and some of those are already professionals because of the scholarship that he provided. Right now, he can say he is successful.
Mrs. L is a laundry woman who accepts services to many people in a day. She can finish 3 household laundries in a day which starts at 3 in the morning ‘til 5 in the afternoon. She is really working hard because she has 4 kids in school. Those kids are depending on her so she must be strong. Until many years of hard work, her kids became ladies and gentlemen who are now professionals. Right now, she can say she is successful.
Mr. A defines success because of achieving many things in life and helping other people while Mrs. L defines success in her life after she was able to let her children finish studies and became professionals.
Did we use measurements of success here? Did we have the standards as our bases?
Yes, there is NONE. Therefore, success can’t be measured by any individuals because it will only be defined by you yourself.
There is failure before every success.
True, Mr. A and Mrs. L may have met different failures while on the process of achieving success same as an Olympian who breaks bones literally just to participate in a competition to bring home the bacon. Oh yes, same as you who are reading this who went through many things in life until you achieve success.
The best thing that you did is you never resign to failures.
While on the process of thinking all the failures in my life, I came across to this idea of sharing how I have looked failures positively in my life and use it for my own development so let me enumerate the following:
1. SELF-ASSESSMENT
Having many failures in my life brings a big help to my success because I was able to identify my strengths and weakness.
Identifying your strengths and weakness will be helpful for you to become successful in your undertakings. Your strengths are your assets in your life right now while your weaknesses are the reasons why you keep on learning and improving yourself. The learning process will not end because we will never achieve perfection due to having weaknesses in our being.
That is why I always suggest to use “I will learn to do it” instead of “I can’t do it because I don’t know how.”
I remember the time when I was being appointed as the overall-coordinator of a small organization in my college days. The organization is composed of more or less 200 people but the responsibility is much big. I can still remember the words of our dean when she said ”Thank you for accepting the challenge”, leaving me an idea on how big and arduous the responsibility and task that is coming. However, I was so determined to learn the things that needed to be learnt and so it became my fuel.
Truly, the position is not easy. Honestly, it’s 90% failure and 10% success sounding me so awful. Yes, it’s true. I admit. It is my first time to handle people but in that 90% failure I have 100% learning and that made my leadership journey special. In addition, I was able to evaluate my strengths and weaknesses in leading and that somehow lead me think that I am more than a follower :-D.
I hope you also had your moments of failing with learning. Feel free to share how you’ve discovered yourself because of failing.
2. IT IMPROVES MY RELATIONSHIP WITH MY FRIENDS, FAMILY, AND GOD
Having many failures in life improves my relationship with friends, family and God.
Friends
Eagles do fly above the storm during typhoon.
I am so thankful to all the eagles that surround me during storms in my life.
During the times of my failures is the improvement of my relationship with my friends. I was able to determine who are those friends who are willing to fly with me above the storm, people who are willing to help and to stay.
Therefore, failures are designed for you to know who to laugh and who to cry on.
Family
Not all of us are very open to our families in terms of problems in schools and in work especially in some minor failures. I myself is also one of us. Sometimes, I don’t bother tell them because I don’t want them to worry about me. However, they will always be there for you.
Though I was struggling without telling them, I know they care for me. The unending support of my family through tough time is already enough to keep me going.
During my failures in life, my family is my great haven. Why? They correct me with my mistake but they never judged me and they know I’ve done wrong but they still accept me.
One thing is for sure, your family is also your haven in times of failure.
GOD
”If you can’t control the situation anymore let God control it for you.”
If you think you have done your very best and you can’t still do it then, it must be the right time to let God control it for you. If you think you keep on failing and failing all over again that may mean that God is directing you to the right path where you are destined to be.
This was the idea that I was holding into during times of failures. I firmly believe that our life is designed by God Almighty and it was given to us because He knows we can surpass it.
In moments of failure and success I only trust unto Him. It is only Him I have offered all my tears of failures and success in life because He is the reason to all of this.
He must be praised with both rising and setting of the sun.
3. IT IMPROVES MY DECISION MAKING
One of the major tasks of adult is to make decisions for himself and one factor that will affect the decision making is the presence of failures.
Have you experienced being refused by your parents for so many times in attending late night parties?
Well, that may be caused by the presence of failures. These may not be true to all but may be true to some: failure of your parents of getting married at the right time because of that scenario and that failure may ripple. This may be sound traditional but this is happening.
However, in a lighter mode failures really improved my decision making. In a way that I have been so cautious of not repeating the mistakes I have done in the past to this present. Having learnt the lessons of those mistakes guides me in doing the right thing as the universal principle.
I can still remember my silliness after 2 months of graduation. I honed myself to become a teacher but I applied for a job that doesn’t fit to being a teacher. Honestly, while looking at the signage of that establishment it made me think that I really belong there. However, after a month of training and on the field I have realized that I am not happy with it. I honestly failed because I resigned from that job however, the moment I stopped and the moment I realized that I failed is also the moment that I was able to find the best place that suits my ability and experience.
It was that very moment that I realized that deciding to stop for something is also deciding to start for a new thing. It was also the moment that I have made the right decision because I have failed on the first one.
4. IT CAN HELP YOU GIVE IMPACT TO THE COMMUNITY
I was working with computer all day long in my previous job that means I have access to my social media accounts during my leisure time. I was so fond of chatting with friends before, leaving my inbox fruitful. One day, a message popped up and it was heartbreaking.
”Ga, wala ko kapasar sa board exam.”
(Ga is an endearment in the Philippines. It is a clipped word that says Palangga or may be a sweetheart in English. The term is used by couples or by older people talking to younger ones. This time, it was my good friend who is older than me who informed me that she wasn’t able to pass the board examination.)
The message is so heartbreaking because I have known the struggles and sacrifices she went through while being a student. However, I must be strong in talking to her in order for me to address her emotions properly. The talk was too long but I ended up with this message.
”Ate, show to the world that you are still happy with the result because you are an inspiration. Seeing you standing up after you fall down is a great inspiration to many people. Don’t worry because you have a beautiful story to tell.”
Imagine your life without failures and your community that has many. How can you relate to them and how can you inspire them? How can you say that Hey! I was once there but I have moved on and this is because I bla.. bla… bla…? Therefore, if you failed today that means you will tell an inspiring story tomorrow.
Be happy with your FAILURES because someday you’ll be making great IMPACT to someone’s life.
WORDS TO PONDER
Jack Canfield
Malcolm Forbes
Albert Einstein
Thomas A. Edison
Bill Gates
Henry Ford
Zig Ziglar
Taryn Rose
Winston Churchill
You may also check out the “7 Bible Verses For Those Feeling Like a Failure by Jack Wellman”
YOU ARE IMPORTANT TO ME
Thank you so much for reading everyone!
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