Ever been filled with the desire to change some for good because of a destructive attitude or behavior which you saw in them? How did it end up? Most probably chaotic.
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We all have flaws and so we are bound to meeting people who have flaws as well of which some can be really destructive. And I fully understand the feeling one has seeing his/her loved ones or even a stranger displaying a destructive attitude.
The truth is we can't change people because we have seen flaws in them which we believe should be made right. Putting so much effort to change them only ends up being counterproductive.
People already know that they need to change even before we shout it in their faces. They know they need to be a bit kind before we shut them down for their unkind behavior.
People don't change people, change is generated from the inside but we can inspire people to. I think a better way is to find the source of all their negative attitude, it is most probably a broken part of that person and help the person heal from it — with love😊. Let's understand that people deserve our love and not our judgments.
Undoubtedly, every desire to change people sprouts out of love but that desire to change can easily lose touch of that love and it suddenly turns into wanting to control. And control does the worst hings to people's relationship
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The message of love can easily get masked under the desire to change. Yes, it's good to want to make the best out of our loved ones. It is good to want someone to let go of their destructive habits. It's all for good but we can't change them simply by wanting to "change" them or trying so hard to.
Yes, that person's behavior or actions could be destructive to themselves or others around them but so also is the desire to change them
When you feel that their attitude or behavior is too toxic for you, then, you can create space for both of you to breath a bit.
If you can't love close by, you can still love from afar. Love is all about acceptance also about letting others live. When you feel like all your efforts in "changing" someone to what you think is a healthier habit is failing then its probably because you have lost touch with your motivation. Go back and get connected with it and let it lead you.
So, next time you are being talked to harshly, don't waste effort talking back in a harsh tone with aim of trying to correct, you can always counter the harsh talks with loving words. Not only will you feel better but it will inspire the person as well.
And when someone talks or acts unlikely to you, it could be a cry for love, so why don't you answer to that cry and help that soul heal?
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Some people may not know how to let their light shine but you can inspire them to shine theirs by shinning yours!
Much Love — Audrey❤