Parents become - wisdom inclusive
The view of the world changes with one's own children - this experience is actually made by all parents. One recognizes connections that were previously closed to one and comes a long way further in his search for the meaning of life. For young parents hold them in their arms, as our author has recognized.
After becoming a father my oldest friend Heiko congratulated me. He, also in his late thirties, living without his own children and his character as a permanent teenager, used the words: "With child, you have really gone through the full program. Respect!". Later, I often thought of what he said - "the full program". But actually came with the baby new insights into my life. Many of the basic things that make up our lives are only now clear to me. It was as if not only new doors opened in my perception, but entire floors. I'm sure most parents can understand that. Here are some of the things that I think I understand now:
The love of parents for their children exceeds every imagination
No one without children can really imagine how strong the love of parents is with their kids. The constant closeness to the child, holding, smelling, caring creates a bond that is stronger than any other force in the world. Who has not heard of reports of parents who, in the event of a threat to their children, suddenly find supernatural powers to save them? In the meantime I do not doubt it anymore. Likewise, without thinking about it, I would use my own life for my child. This deep, selfless love of parents is hard to explain. She comes with the child and grows with the time she spends with him. I used to say goodbye to my own mother on the phone with the words "I love you", whereupon she answered "I love you even more". I'm sure she was right now.
Human life and sex play only one purpose
Actually, all life biologically revolves around surviving to bring children into the world and raise them. This is what nature intended. In our civilized world you can overlook that.
The whole game between the sexes of puberty - whether shyness and shame, first falling in love, holding hands, "dating", fumbling, sex, relationship - in the end, it's all about finding a partner with whom, or rather, woman because they determine the rules that children want to put into the world. All the getting-to-know, going out and also the sex is a kind of test run, a try out for the emergency, namely the living together as a parent. Men / boys, on the other hand, often see sex as a goal and thus do not comprehend much, the consequence of the game, far from it. By the way, another thing I've learned is where we're at it: Female breasts may be a great toy for men, but actually they're made for kids. Even that man learns only with the time ...
What is really important in a partnership
No, it's not sex. At the latest when the baby is born, young parents learn that the foundation of a partnership is to solve problems together - even under stress and sleep deprivation. This includes being able to argue and forgive, to acknowledge alleged mistakes and to be able to show feelings. Sex can be a good putty for a relationship, but in the long run is not critical to a working partnership.
What is really in life
By nature, I'm not a family man at all. For a long time, I tried to avoid family reunions as much as possible. With my own child, I have come to realize that one's own family is the nucleus of society and the extended family is a network of like-minded people. One can count on this network ideally, if one needs help as a parent once - and help one needs in one way or another - and therefore one should cultivate the family ties. You also notice that the whole thing is not as bad as it used to be. In most cases at least.
For children, to provide their well-being and education is as beautiful as exhausting
Children bring many joys that people without kids can not understand. But even no one without children can understand what a great effort it is to look after a child. This lack of understanding often makes it difficult for parents, for example at work. In the past, when I was in my own time, I often reacted with a frustrated shake of my head when one of my employees could not come to work because her child was ill again. Today I understand - and I know that the mother was certainly the least happy about the situation.
With children, the horizon opens up - and the world is rediscovered
As a parent, you get a whole new view of its surroundings. No, I do not just mean children's playgrounds and leisure activities that you did not notice in the past. The world is rediscovered by his children - and you meet them with open eyes: how nature changes with the seasons, what small animals can see along the way, how much fun a piece of chocolate can do, how fascinating a bus or a bus Excavator is and how much magic can radiate a merry-go-round at the Christmas market. Much of this world is shown on a small scale - and as a great person you are often too busy with your thoughts to perceive its magic. Here children manage to stop our world, to adjust our gaze and often to touch our tears.
There is a future - at least on a small scale
Like many people in my generation, I tend to not see things too optimistically. "No Future" was an accepted life plan in the 1980s. Now this does not work anymore. There has to be a future - for my child. "After me the deluge" is no longer in it. So I live differently - with a longer-term horizon, often a little more timid and conservative, but also generally more optimistic. Because the world should, can, must not perish with us. I want to contribute my little part to it - for my children and their children.
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