40 years from now I will sit on the porch with my grandchildren for the daily afternoon stories. It will give me a chance to relive my youth again and give the kids a virtual time-travelling machine.
There will be a tale of a man that I looked up to, a man to learn from and aim to become like.
A very unfortunate turn of events brought him into my world. He was an idol to me, A.M. Looking back, it wasn't so unfortunate if it brought him to me. The half-decade I spent with him were a separate timeline in itself. Everyday was a bit better, a bit productive with him around.
What made A.M. so special? Nothing.
A.M. was an ordinary man. The most mundane of them all. I just had the utmost respect for him.
"How do you command (not demand) the respect of your friends and peers?"
Honestly, I don't know. I never paid any thought to what the second person felt about me, if they respected me or not. I was never bothered by the status of "respect mana" for myself within my company. I have taken pride in living the "lone wolf" life and doing my own thing. Arguably, such are the most unloved people.
But I would like to answer the question, from a different perspective. I do not have any clue of what I do to command respect from others, but I do know how A.M. won my respect without even ever pointing at it, ever.
The first time I ever looked at A.M. with sheer respect was a lot later than I had only started respecting him. Prior to that I saw him as a man and admired his drive, integrity and worth.
Maybe that is the secret. The secret scroll to earning respect. Appreciate yourself, love yourself, admire your work, be driven and focused, show integrity and give your life some value.
A.M. and I have been through a lot of muddy situations, together. I know his life inside and out. From the first time he learnt how to wipe to how he felt when his dad passed away but A.M. stayed locked onto his computer screen just to bury his emotions.
A.M. was admirable. The kind of admirable that stands his ground when the "dudes" call him a wuss for not hanging around in the club for too long. The kind of admirable who was always chosen as the "buffer" when two parties argue and look at A.M. to give the most unbiased opinion and set things straight. The kind of admirable who was cutthroat with softest blows. The kind of admirable who never gave anyone else the chance to be the bigger person.
I learnt about A.M. through his actions. He was in a stronghold of people who regularly practiced what we know as "friendly racism", but was the only one to stand against it knowing he could lose all the people he knew since childhood.
He showed me that being driven, even if it is for the lamest cause in the entire universe, was the most fruitful no matter what the world says. He showed me that being passionate about something you love can take you to great heights.
I did not lie when I said he was the most mundane person I ever met. He was the type that stopped looking at the girl who he deeply felt for just because she seemed interested in his friend. He did not even tell his friend a word.
When I learnt about it I was furious. A.M. later explained that was it more valuable to hurt your friend or to chase a relationship that would either be shorter than his friendship or not happen at all?
A.M. was so mundane that he literally did not have more than a handful of friends until 3 years of us meeting.
Everywhere I went people asked me what Mr.Popular is doing with the lamest dude in town. I used to answer "talk to him and you will fall in love".
There wasn't a quarrel where he didn't try to play mediator and dissolve the issue. He always became the bigger person and apologized to the 2 parties on behalf of each other.
He tried helping whomever possible, not caring for himself. He always looked for the greater good. May it be financially when he was broke, or tagging along someone who had a long journey ahead of them.
It became apparent how worthy of respect was the simple man, when eventually he took on the spot of Mr.Popular in the bars to the workplace. He was entitled to it since there was no one more classy, honest, modest and helpful than him.
He became the shoulder to everyone's problems. He was the one everybody could turn around to.
It was A.M. who taught me what genuine respect is.
I did not know what "earning" respect really meant until I met A.M. And I am glad we met.
Cheers, brother.
You are an idol to me, and someone the world should look up to.
Shoutouts
Thanks 
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