I was tired of listening to her since she never took my advice anyway and I spent each day worrying it would be her last because of the intensity of the abuse?
I used to have a friend who would do this too. She would often seek advice, but she never took it seriously. She would find herself enmeshed in a cycle of marital problems, constantly seeking guidance to resolve them. One night, she pleaded with me to come over to my place, unable to tolerate her husband's behavior (he was just a jerk but never physically abused her). I said, "No, look, my kids and I are unwell, and we need to rest, and I can't rest while having you unloading your endless issues on me." I basically stopped taking her calls since then. Did I feel guilty? Of course, but my mental health and the family are important too. She never once asked me how I was doing, whether I was well, or if the kids were okay. No, never. She was using me to unload her BS and nothing else. I haven't spoken to her for almost 10 years now, and I don't regret it one bit.
I'm glad you're establishing boundaries with your friends ❤️
RE: Helper or Saviour....