This and all the fractals you are about to see are all are sibling variations, made in two different palettes in Apophysis 2.09!
My uncle had a look that I hated so much in teen years, a look that went with a fatherly phrase that I also hated until I was mature enough to understand where he was coming from.
“Khadijah, I see what you are trying to do here … Khadijah, I understand why you think that … let me explain why in actual life, that doesn't work.”
I was a whole captain at 36 years old, and he as a whole admiral of 82 could still give me that same look, and I knew what was coming out of his mouth.
The situation on this occasion was regarding the 20-hour visit of Princess Shaain, and my wondering about their immediate deep connection and the potential end of his long bachelor stand.
“Khadijah, I understand why you might think that … you and Rufus met at the right place at the right time. You each met your person at a time when each felt comfortable that you could make a life together, and because that was so perfect, it hasn't occurred to you how rare that really is. Because you left for the Academy when I was 64, you also have no sense of just how many 24-hour sessions retired scientists get into because the ability to love another person's mind and spirit is the deepest engagement humanly possible. Her Highness understands that as well.”
“Well, I do get that – I do love Rufus's mind and spirit,” I said. “That's an important part of our marriage, because we don't get to see each other that often right now.”
“Yet it still works – it's still tough, but it holds things together,” Uncle Benjamin said. “Yet if your relationship were only romantic and physical, you would already be finished.”
“Yes,” I said.
“It is a clear-headed place to be, also,” Uncle Benjamin said.
“It is,” I said.
“So, consider Her Highness Princess Shaain,” he said. “She is an absolutely stunning being in every way, a being about whom I can honestly say that she exists to be loved. It would not be possible not to have a heart and a soul and senses and not know that – but there is a difference between that and taking possession, and a difference between taking possession and accepting stewardship. For me to get to that last acceptance, that requires me to make a definite choice – and then that is not the only choice.”
Uncle Benjamin fired up his big monitor and pulled up a fleet map.
“In the Academy, did they happen to mention why the Sinabar Loop is there?”
“No,” I said.
“I was there on the day the reason for that loop manifested,” he said, “and here are the Sinabarn Guardians.”
“Ooooooooooooooooooo-kay,” I said after taking the visual in.
“Now, would you trust a smile like that?” he said, his eyes twinkling.
“The thing looks like every caricature of a smarmy salesman built out into a relative of a Ring Admiral I have ever seen,” I said, “but of course, a Sinabarn Guardian knows nothing about that, so, that isn't a fair assessment.”
“And here is the lesson, Khadijah. If ever you see that smile in person, what you think about it is ultimately irrelevant. You live to tell the tale if the being on the other side of that smile trusts you. Now you can do things to make that outcome more likely, but it's not about how you feel. It's not entirely up to your feelings.
“Now, that's a Sinabarn Guardian in a mellow mood, Khadijah. That's what you want to see. The flotilla I was part of came very humbly to retrieve information on what had happened to our galactic rival's fleet, and explained that we would never intrude on a star system that did not want to offer us passage. We already had picked up data that went with the visions of Sinabarn Guardians gleefully destroying trespassers … this is the first of the last things our rivals ever saw … a Sinabarn Guardian revealing its second power level...
“... and after that you would think it and its companions were putting on a light and fashion show and game at once … here comes Milady Death, wearing several boas of photon serpents …
“Milord the Lightning Juggler, with his great skill at turning photons about …
“And then, you see this, photon webs served with a smile...
“But then, because our rival has a sea fleet as well, they thought getting a few ships through to Sinabar 8's oceans to hide them at depth might work … and so met death smiling on the surface …
Original photo by Enrique from Pixabay, with pure fractal made in Apophysis 2.09 inserted and sky and mountains mildly purpled in Paint 3D
“… and if not there, then in the deep itself, fishing for their vessels with those photon nets.”
Original photo by Tabby Cat from Pixabay, with pure fractal made in Apophysis 2.09 inserted in Paint 3D
“We were allowed to collect the data as a galaxy-wide warning; the Sinabarn Guardians have allowed our fleet to be stewards of the safety of all bodied sentient space-going creatures in their region. We gave them service with a smile, got the business done, and departed.”
I looked at him, and had a realization.
“Who was the lead captain, under the commodore?” I said.
“Mine,” my uncle said, “owing to the confidence he and the commodore had in a particular science officer who shall go without needing to be named.”
“You've been a steward of humanity's safety in space for a long time,” I said. “That's already four or five decades back.”
“And, I have always known who I was, and what I was primarily called to,” he said. “Sure, I have made some fascinating discoveries about other things in space along the way for which I am now best known, but that was not the assignment. I am, and have always been, a steward – a husband – to the future of humanity in space, mainly keeping us out of trouble. Nothing has changed but my age, Khadijah.”
“So, you've been single all this time, because … .”
“Because I have never been assigned a partner by the Lord in the work – I have been assigned the collegial support of peers, the mentorship of younger officers and scientists, including yourself and also Rufus, who keeps humanity fed and supplied out there, but as of yet, no co-laborer to me has been shown to me. Princess Shaain as an Uppaaimarn princess is likely not an exception to the rule, and even if I were to think she is, she also would have to believe it, and step away from the affairs of her own people to be with me.
“So, she and I can smile, and enjoy each other's company and conversation – and it is not that Her Highness does not think of humanity's affairs as important, since she is a devout member of the Looking community and knows the work we are doing assures Earth won't get blotted out before the Redeemer gets here. She encouraged me so much, Khadijah. If I were a selfish man, I would think to myself how nice it would be to have a wife as altogether lovely as she is … but she's about seven times my age, and she's on vacation from exploring the galaxies, plural. I'm an old human admiral, not on vacation, and up to my eyeballs trying to get the group from the third planet of the Solar System to act like they have some sense regarding our future in space. That's not a match, Khadijah.”
“I guess it's not,” I said.
“If she were more like a human princess,” he said, “and I had rescued her from anguish and heartbreak, she might also look at me and think, 'He's a prince of a man, but a human – he'll only live another 40-60 years anyhow – I can stay on vacation and have my fairy tale.' But life is not a fairy tale, not for humans, and also, not for the Uppaaimar.”
I sighed.
“I worry about being far away when you pass on, and there being nobody here for you, Uncle.”
“Remember, Khadijah,” Uncle Benjamin said, “I was willing to go two years ago, but it was not time because Rufus got here in the nick of time and space – so, I won't be leaving until my work is done, and clearly, it is not. Where I am going, and we are going, the wonder of truth, peace, and righteousness in perfection will be enough for me to not worry about who is here when I leave – and Khadijah, are we ever truly alone?”
“No, not with Whom we have believed in.”
“So, let that worry go, my niece. I love you and I appreciate your concern, deeply – let the worry part go before it hurts you more than it has.”
“I'm working on it, Uncle. I am.”