When it comes to tradition, I think the women have the worst of it more than the men do, and as if that is not enough,gh, we are saddled with the idea that is a must and important that a lady should get married and remain married because it makes society respect and sees her as a responsible person even if they don't wish to and have the worst case of abuse in that marriage.
The fun fact is that it becomes worse when you are not just a lady but the first daughter, you are saddled with the tradition of setting the right pace, so that your younger ones can tread and if you don't walk in the way the "tradition" demands, then there is a high risk that your younger ones especially the ladies will follow in your footstep.
A few years back, I got talking with my mom after I heard that her father was going to share his properties with his children, and when I asked her what was her share of her father's property, I got the shock of my life. She said nothing was allocated to her and her sisters and it is against tradition, also, she and her sisters are no longer part of that family and do not have a right to any property of their father.
And I asked, "Even when you are a widow and need their help?" At least a land from them to help cultivate isn't a bad idea. Well, it doesn't change, except the men decide within them to give her a portion of their inheritance, she owns nothing. It is yet funny, that when there is a challenge the women are the first to be called upon.
Women are given the task or sole responsibility to care for their aged parents in their families even when they do have their own families bore from marriage more than the men in the family because it is believed that the men have started their own families and should be allowed to raise theirs.
It is shocking and disheartening to know that when the father or mother decides to share their inheritance, the women or female children of that family are all left out. They do not own anything in their father's house, and not even a cup, is added to their names but when it involves finances, they will not forget to involve the women.
A charm or curse is placed on every woman who decides to go out even in her marital home to have an affair with a man but unfortunately, such charm or curse isn't placed on men even when we know that men cause the most adultery in the world, all because they are with the mindset that "it is a man's nature to desire more than one woman".
Women are believed to be the problem of their marriage or bearing children even if the man who is the husband can, could, and is also the problem of their marriage and childbearing. They are expected to go for cleaning, move from one prayer house to another, and drink different concoctions presented to them by their mother-in-law and their own mother. They believe that it is in the place of a woman to find a solution to their marital challenges or childlessness.
If she is not willing to be submissive, lay down her career, her life, and her property and do only the bidding of her husband because he chose her out of the many women in the world who are willing and ready, to cater to the needs of her husband and kids, then she is not a wife material and should like a child be taught how to do the biddings of her husband who is her king.
As if that is not enough, the single ladies are constantly warned and shunned not to live too big, dream big,g and live their lives mediocre just so they will be able to bag a husband for themselves even when they have what it takes to live buoyantly. All in the name of "men run away from women who live big because they feel those women will control them and not be submissive to them in their marital home.
Thank you for reading through!!!