I never knew there was a term called imposter syndrome until the topic was brought up for discussion on the Hivenaija community. I guess there is a name for everything going on with the human race and the fact that something like this has happened to me is what makes it interesting. When it happened I just brushed it off because it wasn’t anything spectacular especially with the way people in the office were talking about it.
You might be wondering what “Imposter syndrome” is all about but here is a quick explanation to what it is
Imposter syndrome is a psychological pattern where individuals doubt their accomplishments and have a persistent fear of being exposed as a fraud, despite evidence of their success.
Quite easy to understand right?
How did this happened to me, you might ask but worry not, I’ll explain everything to you so you can understand easily.
2023, in the city of Abuja, I was working at a very nice organization where what you have to offer and the proof of your capacity is what determine your value. I was just the normal guy who comes to the office, go through documents and when I’m done, I’ll start watching the time hoping for closing hour.
I wasn’t too bothered about accomplishing anything but there are time when I do things, it would look like a big deal in the eyes of other workers but to me it was just a normal thing. I would give two examples.
The minister of information and technology in Nigeria was someone our company have been trying to reach and share a proposal with but every trial leads to failure. Either he wasn’t in the office or he was busy. Most of the senior staffs have gone to the minister office many times and failed. That day, I was just in the office and was less busy, the chairman asked if we have been able to submit the proposal and the answer was we haven’t been able to.
He was angry and was shouting all around the office, the admin staff reluctantly asked me to try since most of the senior staff were out on assignments. Truthfully, I don’t even know the place or my way around the city. When I got to the National Building, I got same message, he wasn’t around but I met a man who also wanted to see him. He was older than me and one thing led to another we started talking, he called the minister and he told him were he was, so this man offered to take me there. I agreed and we went to see the minister, we spoke and I explained briefly what the proposal was all about. In fact, I did a rubbish presentation but the following week, the office of the minister called and they were ready to partner with us.
All the thanks went to me and I got a bonus but truthfully, I didn’t see it as anything because it felt like fate was what allowed it happened.
The second part was, most of the goods in our store was just there and I was the one taking stock of all the goods, I met with the admin and told her we could sell some of the goods instead of just letting them stay in the store. She was reluctant but gave me some of our vendors line, I spoke with them and told them some of the goods we had. They were willing to buy so I just gave the negotiating part to the admin and we sold half of the things in the store resulting to inflow of hundreds of thousands to the company.
I was given a new position and the fear of not worthiness that position hit me because I felt everything that has been happening was just luck and not my hard work. We even got a contract to build a hospital but all I did was just stand and smile to the board during the presentation and it was awarded to us.
Anyway, I got a lot of bonus from the company and they kept saying I did a lot for them. Probably I did without realizing it, I had a good time working with them and it was worth it.
This is how I feel sometimes when I achieve something huge, I just feel it’s all luck but maybe I should give myself some accolades too.
Thanks for reading. My name is fashtioluwa.
