The last time I was able to see Tayo, she was smiling at me with this feeling of her knowing a particular secret she didn't want me to hear.
It was during the Cold Harmattan Season in the city of Lagos. Everything was dry including the air and even the dust was so red. Everything was cracking including the two old friendship that has lived for long. Tayo and I grew up around few house apart around the Ikeja Street.
We have lovey memories of climbing mango trees together and even taking bath even in the rain. I remember us buried a bird called Jack in a sardine can even when we were around 9 years old.
For both of us, we are actually more than friends, we were sisters that were not by blood but by every other thing that matters.
But everything changed after university. Tayo returned back from Lagos differently from the person I knew her to be. She returned back with laughter more harder and her silence been longer. She started talking about energy and vibration.
One fateful evening, she disappeared
There was no goodbye, no note and nothing. Just a locked room that was filled with clean plates that belong to her.
"I was told Tayo joined the cult" Mama responded.
"Mama, I don't think so, I guess it was drugs" said Busayo who was our neighbour.
"That is how cultist behave. They will first isolate themselves and suddenly disappear " she further said.
But deep within me, I didn't believe them. For me, the Tayo I knew have always been too curious, and always want to live a life that is much more fulfilled. I guess there is something much more.
After around 1 month after she disappeared, I received a particular email.
"Dear friend, you will have to look beyond what they tell you. The answer is at Jack grave. When it is midnight, come alone."
At first, my heart wanted to tear apart.
I remember Jack grave, it was behind a huge iroko tree.
Around 11:55pm, I walked out of the house holding a torchlight. There was darkness and total silence everywhere.
I can't find any sardines can but I saw a small black notebook that was resting on the floor and the first page was carrying Tayo handwriting
"I found a door"
The entry to the room was actually so terrifying.
"It was not a dream, it was not really hell but it was still terrifying.
Tayo described everything especially the rituals of silence.
The last entry read in the book;
"If I am able to cross fully, I might not come back. But if you see me, you can still do good to actually pull me home with memory and not with force"
I spend week upon week to actually find the possible clues from the notebook starting from the places we visited when we were still young to what she always say to me. I even tried to play our favourite songs loud.
Then this fateful night, I actually dreamed of her.
We were around Jack Grave whereby she was expressing her expectation to me.
"I was waiting for you" she said
"But where do you go Tayo?" I asked.
"I went somewhere peaceful and that I believe was filled with so much peace. But I guess it is only peace when you share it"
Then I woke up from the dream crying.
The next fateful morning, I heard a knock.
Opening the door, I saw her standing barefoot with a strong Harmattan wind.
"Tayo! Is that you?"
She smiled back to me.
"Yes it is me, you actually brought me back"