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Traditions are peculiar to the numerous ethnic groups we have in Nigeria, what is common and normal to a particular village could be an abomination to another. Also, no two communities share the same kind of heritage right or cultural traditions except the one that is general. The most annoying part of some of these traditions is the fact that educated and exposed humans still carry them out to the latter without putting into consideration the feelings of others or their siblings. My frustration is born out of the recent happenings I just witness after a polygamous man died and did not leave a will before passing on.
Heritage encompasses the passing down of inheritance from one generation to another be it cultural, natural or historical assets depends on the properties available to the deceased before death. It's always a good thing if a will is documented before passing and if not, it is always problematic and difficult to share between siblings. Examples of such assets can include; buildings, houses, farmlands, artifacts, sacred sites, jewelries and so on. It is a common practice in Nigeria for children to inherit something from their parents, somehow it seems like a goal everyone is trying to achieve to as not to be called a failure.
Recently I attended a burial ceremony of a well-renowned and known man in the church apparently his was considered as a celebration of life because he was way older. He was a well respected man in the community and as such is funeral was attended by all and sundry I am a bit close to the family and happened to know that the man is polygamous in nature he has three wives and children from these three different women. When the elderly man was very sick he was taking care of by one of the wives that stayed with him in this village. He got so sick that he could not feed himself he could not wash himself is sometimes pulled on himself and stuff like that this woman took care of him and cleaned him up with her children who constantly stayed with him.
Unfortunately, he could not survive as the body was already too old and it was his time to join his ancestors. It was at the time the man died that other children from the other women who had been careless and carefree about their father's health began to show up because her apparently it was time for inheritance to be shared. Baba did not write a will for reasons best known to him and this caused problems as the eldest son was trying to sabotage everything. It is the traditional custom that when a man dies everything he owns is giving to the first son of the family and nothing for his siblings or anyone on else.
So even if the man has many daughters and the boy happens to be the last child he still considered as the first son of the family. Due to the disparity amongst this polygamous family the son wanted to inherit everything and abandon his siblings from the other women but with the intervention of the community he shared peanuts to his stepmothers and the senior children from the other women. This is the reason why I consider it an archaic tradition because obviously, it's relegates women to the background it doesn't consider them as human beings or an integral part of the family, again the tradition gives Monopoly to just one person as against others whose opinions do not matter.
Not to be biased I know of families who are polygamous in nature and their peaceful and unified in everything they do but as they say different strokes for different folks.
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