Parenting isn’t an easy feat. Raising a child from childhood till maturity requires sacrifices and a whole lot of other resources. Although I am not a parent yet, I believe one of the reasons couples prefer not to have kids in their first year of marriage is that they know it changes everything- responsibility sets in. Before children set in, your sole focus is on your partner. You and your partner have all day to yourself to do whatever pleases you. However, once children arrive, your attention is divided. One half goes to your partner, the other half goes to the kid(s). In the hands of parents, are the responsibilities of building and shaping their children’s lives. As long as you’ve brought them into this world or are their guardian, the responsibilities of taking care of them, preventing them from going astray, and leading them to become better versions of themselves, are in your hands.
Parents must be ready to instill in their kids values and norms. In today’s world where everyone is busy trying to make ends meet, it is easy to get lost in the daily hustling and bustling and forget about your kids. As good parents, it is important to find a balance between your work and children. No matter how busy your schedule is, make time to teach your children the right values and norms. If parents don’t instill these values in their children from home, they’ll get taught outside and it is going to be the hard way. For example, instead of teaching your children the importance of contentment, you neglect and fail in that area until the child steals outside and gets beaten. That way, they’ll probably learn a lesson. So, it is up to you to choose whichever seems better to you- whether to make time for your children or to allow them to learn outside. Today’s Inleo prompt asks us to share our thoughts about parental values and norms.
According to Nautilus Behavioral Health, parental values are characteristics you want to possess as a parent so your children can learn from them. One of the most important parental values is patience. Growing up, this is one of the qualities my mother often exhibited when problems arose, and it helped her in a lot of ways. In marriages, there are good times and bad times. The devil often targets strong marriages, and one way he does this is through one of the partners. There will be days when your partner may start causing problems, possibly due to mood swings or something you've done. The last thing you want to do is retaliate and escalate the situation. Instead, the best approach is to exercise patience and remain quiet. If your partner is upset, your words might only fuel their anger. So, it's better to be patient. Wait until they've calmed down, then have a conversation. That way, they'll be more likely to listen.
Another important parental value is communication. The importance of effective communication in marriages cannot be overemphasized. It is the foundation of a healthy marriage. Your partner should be your best friend and go-to person when it comes to communication. If you don’t communicate with your partner, who else will you do that with? For example, when conflicts arise, the best way to do this is to come together and figure out how to resolve them. Ask yourselves these questions, “what are we doing wrong? How can we do better? How can we prevent future conflicts?” Two heads are better than none- coming together to proffer solutions is the best and easiest approach. Also, both parents must be free to communicate their deepest worries with their partners. If anything is messing with your mental health, your partner should be your go-to person. This builds trust and emotional intimacy.
Moving on, another important value is cooperation. It is important to strive to possess this quality. Growing up, this was one of the values that strengthened the relationship between my parents. Instead of making decisions individually, it is important to consult your partner. No matter how little the thing is, working together with your partner is the right approach. For example, a husband goes ahead to paint the house white without consulting his wife. What if the wife had other colors in mind and felt white wouldn’t be good? This might cause conflict. I’m sure you agree with me that it would be better if they came together and agreed on a specific color.
In conclusion, parental values and norms are important stuff parents must possess to be able to instill and influence their children positively. When the parents act right, the children learn from them.
This is my entry to the INLEO prompt for day 13. The topic is; Parental values and norms.
Thanks for reading.