For my old followers, my accident story is not something new. I mentioned about it a couple of times in my post and sometimes my writing reflects the differences between the real me vs me on medication. But, I would not mind telling it all over again because I had epiphany yesterday after finding my prescription and researched their usage.
The story first started in May 2016. I woke up in a hospital bed with breathing aid and feeling sore all over my body. Later I came to know, I was involved in a major accident and was fallen into a coma for about 10 hours. So,I was sort of dead. I came to know something was odd because I began to speak in a language that I barely speak with a stranger. I was speaking English to the nurses at the hospital and they were puzzled. I was not even speaking much that time and the only person which I kept mentioning was my mama (mom). I also did not remember anything prior the accident and there was disconnection with the past. Long short story, a week later I was out of the hospital. Then, life started to change.
For the record, I have been living on my own since 17. And so that time, my mom was staying in my flat assisting me with my daily routine. She had to hold me to walk and tried to have a little conversation with me. I still did not speak much other than with hand signs and a few simple instructions. So a week after the hospital, it was the final week at my university. I did not want to fail. Hence, I insisted to attend all the exam while still having difficulty walking and even stuttering in my speech. I did not even know what I was presenting and my knowledge of Charles Dickens, pilgrim progress, Shakespeare all were gone. I recalled having an essay about Charles Dicken and I tried so hard to remember who he was. I ended up leaving some of the essay question blank. Then, I had a lecturer told me that I should not use my stutter as an excuse because I could have repeated the exam due the accident. She didn’t understand how persistent I was to made it through the final. I did not want to be a failure and fail. Yet In the end, I failed and she was right.
Day to day life was not the same. I did not remember some of my relatives name, or what I used to know, or do. It was all gone. My mom had to tell me what I did when I was a little or who I was, or things that I used to know and love. My friends were also telling me that I was different.Also during that time, I could never eat outside and surrounded by too many people. I was very sensitive to light and noises. My mom also told me that I had a terrible navigation. She mentioned that I was being careless in crossing the street whilst also sleeping a lot more than a normal person. It was all something odd to see from me.
So, after the hospital, we regularly visited the neurologist to check my condition. I was always the youngest person in the waiting room. It was all filled with people in their mid 40 to 70 having problem with their neuron system. I was very enthusiastic about getting better, so I asked the doctor “ How long will it take for me to recover?” I was saying something like that but in a broken Bahasa. And he replied, “ I don’t know, it can take months even years”. Later he added, “ You should do a bed rest and refrain from any activity that requires thinking for about three months”. Did I follow that advice? no I didn’t.
When I was at the hospital, the doctor gave me a lot of medications. Some of it included, Ceftriaxone injection for meningitis, proneuron, remopain, ondansentron, dexpira injection, Dexpira 1200mg (commonly known as piracetam), and brainolin (also variant of nootropic). To be precise, it helps with dementia, head trauma, cerebrovascular disease age-related memory loss, Parkinson's disease, and attention deficit-hyperactive disorder (ADHD).Then, for regular check up, it was only dexpira, proneuron and brainolin. These medication lasted until I moved back home in mid 2016 during the summer break.
Having to go back home was refreshing even everything was still foreign. My mom was telling all the things that I did in the past. I still couldn’t fathom because everything was different. Then I made a lot of new friends and moved on with life. During my recovery process, I even got to meet someone I used to love. He was the reason I was on steemit. So big thanks to him because I get to meet a lot of amazing people.
Life was good for a second. Then, I stopped the medication in late 2016 because my family and I thought that I was completely healed judging by my physical appearance. Little did we know, I was on a withdrawal phase. Soon, lifewas filled with careless and thoughtless decision. I was even running away from my family with my past boyfriend. It was crazy time because I thought they were all against me and suddenly my adoption story was a huge drama. Short story, I went loco and against everyone who were close to me. The fun lasted until my past boyfriend and I had to be separated due our study and responsibilities. Things just got worse. I was constantly feeling sad, feeling something was wrong, thinking everything was painful and unfair. I was very suicidal. I had couple of attempts in the past. In fact, I wrote it all on steemit as well. Then, what more painful was the only one whom I thought loved me, was leaving as well. Everyone who I used to consider family left me all alone. I was also developing drinking habit- which is not really good for my brain and depression. It continued until sometime.
I was on steemit that time then I encountered one of amazing individual because I was interested in 3d printing. I referred her as Z in most of my stories. I want to reveal her name but I need her permission. So later if granted, I will tag her. I would not be the same without her. I truly appreciate our friendship and she is an important part of my journey.
We began having a conversation. It was not regular at first but later I told her my story. Long short story, she told me that I should be checking Rhodiola. Before hand, I have heard about it being mentioned during a conversation between my mom, dad and their friend. But it was not easily accessible here. It was also a little pricey for just couple of grams. I found a supplier from a Chinese factory but I was required to buy a kg of it. I thought it was a hassle because it was from an unknown market and I was wondering about the shipping requirements and policy.
Then, I promised Z to visit a local herbal place. I found one nearby my flat. It was a little store with a dim light. But, I decided to give it a try. I asked about Rhodiola but he didn’t have it. So, I mentioned that I had a trouble sleeping, focus and was in an accident. He instantly told me that he had a friend with similar problem and gave me a bottle of gotu kola extract. I was skeptical at first.
But after a few days taking the herb. All the lights that were switched off were on. Life was good, everything was fabulous. I learned things easily, I was able to focus and multitask. It was also easy for me to socialize- I was a social butterfly. Everything was smooth and simply like before. Except I was still neglecting my study and prefer to be working. I worked very hard while consuming the herb regularly. Life was easy.
Then, one time, I forgot to buy it. My brain was foggy. I was unable to wake up from bed, I was groggy and very pale. I looked sick. In the third day, I could not hold it anymore and rushed to the place. I got it and life was back again. I worked like I used to and I knew exactly what I had to do. It was very fun cause I was just turning 20 and suddenly presented with so many possibilities and capitals. With all those work and things I accumulated, something that lacked in my life was easily accessible. Friendship, things and love- I thought I could buy them all. Later I learned it’s not.
Furthermore, I was constantly on and off medication. I began to notice that I could be grumpy, having headaches, and foggy brain. It was like someone switched off the lights. However, after I took it again, my everyday life was just easier and I could function normally.
Gotu kola or penny wort is considered as the elixir of life. It has several uses not only in enhancing cognitive aspect but also healing scars. According to a study, gotu kola water extract given on mice was enhancing their memory and learning ability. Although the effect was higher in the older mice compared to the young mice. In addition, from several sources I have read too, it helps with blood circulations. It actually serves the same purpose with all the racetams which I took in the past.
However, I want to find another alternative besides gotu kola. Thus, if you know anything about alternative natural medication which improves the blood circulation to the brain, please leave a comment. I will truly appreciate it. Also, In the next post, I will be writing my reviews on Piracetam vs Gotu Kola. So, Stay tuned.
Signed, M.