CANADA LEGALIZES MARY WARNER :- Yes that's right. Further proof, if proof were needed that they are indeed Canadian's. Apart from those French Canadian's in Quebec who are French Canadians. The only people who hate these F.C's more than Canadian's are the French. Yes they hate them with all their hearts because of the weird way they speak French. For once I am not making this up. Good luck to them I say, that's for the Canadian's and the F.C's, because they will all be stoned from this point on. Instead of just looking like they are. Another pointless fact about the French being that their most famous person, Napoleon, was in fact Italian.
(The copyright for this image is the property of Reuters.)
Running into the prison, after Doxy hailed him, Jake found himself in a long corridor. Red lights were flashing and the air was filled with smoke and dust. It was hard to see where he was going for a moment. Mainly due to coming in from bright sunshine. As his eyes adjusted he saw the Captain of the Scarlet Harlot taking cover at a corner up ahead. Her head darting out between volley's from whoever was holding her up. He slowly made his way towards her. Purely because she was urgently waving him over and he really needed to piss her off as much as possible. He passed three robotic guards, or parts of them at least. This was a safe bit. As soon as he reached Doxy he'd be safe no longer, mostly due to her he thought.
"Will you get a move on." She yelled. He grinned then paused to examine some interesting wreckage. Those circuit boards were very small. They looked to be made out of colored glass with golden threads lacing through them. A slow count to twenty, before Jake moved on. A dozen slow steps and he was beside her. Well back from the corner.
"Haven't you got any grenades?" He asked out of curiosity.
"What use would they be? They're an anti-personnel weapon used for soft targets. We're facing hardened targets that can take half a dozen rounds of armor piercing munitions. Don't talk out of your ass."
"Sorry." He stated unapologetically. "Where are the human guards?"
"They all took the day off."
That jarred him a bit.
"That's a bit of a coincidence. I thought you said this was all top secret. Only the four of us could know you said. Plus Lady Margaret and everybody at the tavern. I really should fact check you a lot more thoroughly instead of believing every single thing you say."
No surprise with the response. Doxy for all her flaws was honestly dishonest.
"You got me. The human guards took off as soon as the alarms went off. The defense systems can have a lot of difficulty distinguishing friend from foe. Anybody at the settlement who didn't know this was going down will be well aware now."
"Now will you admit that I could easily make my way back inside the city? Solely for administration purposes."
She gave him a funny look.
"You'd have made your way in eventually. Maybe tomorrow or in six months time. I have free passage and an entry bracelet because I deal with a few individuals inside. And before you ask more of your annoying questions my bracelet doesn't work like the ones they issue citizens. I have to ask permission then give a full itinerary they will check up on. You have no idea how much I had to piss about getting permits for successive days so I could find you."
"I'd say I found you."
Her brow furrowed dangerously.
"No you didn't."
"Yes I did. I knew where you were before you grabbed me. I found you. It doesn't matter that I used Custodian's to do that."
She was having none of that. Without a counterargument she changed the subject to something more current.
"I've got an idea."
"If it involves me you'll have to come up with another one. You tricked me into doing the decoy bit for you, now I'm done. You cannot be trusted."
"You haven't even heard it yet."
"I don't need to. It will be the same as everything else you've told me. Missing vital parts and constructed out of bullshit."
"What about camaraderie? What about the old team spirit? Surely you can find it in your heart to forgive and forget for the sake of others."
He rubbed his chin thoughtfully, hoping this would drive his words home.
"Oh the bit where I'm in the team when there's pain to be had then forgotten about afterwards. I don't have comrades. There isn't a person on this planet who gives a shit about my well being. Lastly I had this former comrade and fellow team member who told me my soft heart and kindness would be taken as weakness. Get Slayer to blow the shit out of whatever is holding you up."
"He's too big to get inside, all armored up. Are you a yellow bellied coward?"
She asked provocatively.
"Yes I am. I'm not proud of that fact. It's more a case of me being very self aware. I'll give Slayer a shout on my way out if you like." Jake handed over the chain gun, then turned on his heel.
"Do it for Pip." Doxy wheedled. "She's in imminent danger if we don't get my crew out now."
He didn't bother turning round.
"She'll be back at the tavern by now. Don't forget I was out there getting my ass blown off a few minutes ago. None of the defending forces paid any attention to that bunker. Pip is fine."
With one bound Jake was free. Life would be a lot less exciting now, he hoped. While his little nanite army took care of his wounds they still hurt like the devil. There'd be a lot less pain going forward. As long as he avoided associating with Doxy. A piercing cry of anguished agony from behind him as the robots opened up. He should ignore it. Another one of her tricks, he was sure. To show he wasn't holding a grudge he took a quick look. Doxy was crumpled at the opposite corner to the one she'd been taking cover behind. The chain gun lay in the middle, out in the open. Most noticeable of all was the growing pool of blood issuing from her. Another trick? Of course it was. That blood looked perfectly genuine. There was room for a tiny bit of doubt. Leaving her to her schemes and ploys was the best course. It was no skin off his nose. Her injuries wouldn't be fatal. Even if they were she'd be brought back to life. That was a safe assumption. He gave a long loud angry groan. Why was he such a gullible twat? Jake ran back to the corner. Doxy pulled herself into a sitting position her back against the wall. She feebly waved him away.
"It's alright. Only a flesh wound. I've had a lot worse. Leave me, I'll be fine once I get my breath back."
"How long will it take for your nanites to heal you?" He inquired.
She chuckled painfully.
"You... AARRGGGHHHH. Sorry... that was a bit spiky. I don't have any. It's banned technology inside the Consensus, unless the nanites are part of the Consensus. And you know me and my phobia's. I wouldn't have anything from them inside my body. I'd rather die free than live as a slave."
There was a big probability Doxy was lying. There was a tiny chance she was bleeding out.
"If I can get the chain gun and use it to give you covering fire, do you think you can get back over here to me?"
She shook her head.
"I can barely move. I'll be too slow." She gasped in pain, before continuing. "If you can lay down some fire I can take them out with the fourmag... I think."
Odd how she'd dropped the chain gun yet still managed to keep her own precious weapon. Still it wasn't totally unbelievable, but most of her lies weren't either. He darted his head out then back as rounds flew past his ears. Good idea. Poor execution. He still had no idea what was down the other end of the corridor.
"Right. Here goes."Jake rocked back and forth preparing to dart his hand out to grab the chain gun. As fast as he could he slid his arm across the floor. Figuring that would be quickest and safest. Excruciating torment exploded up his right arm. He'd lost two fingers. They were hanging on by skin and a few tatters of flesh.
"Strap them." Doxy advised. "They will mend in no time. You don't need your fingers to operate it anyway."
"You've pepped up a bit. You could hardly speak before."
"I... uh... I took an adrenaline shot. I'll need it to steady me."
"Adrenaline doesn't steady anything. Still hurts like fuck but I think they're sort of attached now. Can't move them." She was conning him again. Jake was 99% sure of that. "Right. Here goes nothing."
Taking a deep breath, for no rational reason, Jake leaned out and opened fire. The gun wriggling against him. More difficult to control without his index and middle fingers. A slug grazed his head unnoticed due to the three that slammed into his left shoulder. Doxy was up and doing her part. She took out the last two guardians with two explosive, armor piercing rounds. Before sashaying down the once impassable corridor. He fucking knew it. Jake dropped his weapon to fasten his makeshift bandage more securely. Hermes and his boys were doing their job. He knew this when his reattached fingers started to throb, then ache, then torment him. His body would repair itself. His clothes on the other hand were looking a bit tattered. Leaning against the wall he checked his shoulder.
The bleeding had stopped. Two of them had gone right through. Jake wasn't sure if that was good or bad. You lived and you learned. In his case, as far as Doxy was concerned, it was the same lesson over and over again. The demon captain couldn't stop lying and manipulating. For all he knew the crew might not even be here. She was that deceitful. He'd come this far. The hard work was over. Out of curiosity he'd take a look to see why she actually was here. After that he was done. Nursing his right hand and left shoulder he limped down the passageway. Why was he limping? Patting himself down he found a few more holes in his legs. Even with the help of his little friends, Jake felt frail, giddy and sick. He must have been hit over a dozen times. This had been quite a week for him. He sincerely hoped getting shot didn't become a habit. The remains of the guards lay across his path. Struggling over them with spaghetti legs he turned a corner to find Doxy was still working on a security door. It opened as he neared. There was a roar of multiple loud voices when it did so. Doxy stepped through then took a deep bow to more cheering. Okay, so there were people in there. That didn't mean they were her crew.
"We watched it all on the viewing screens Captain. How did you get that dumb mutt to swallow yer tale?"
A gruff voice, with a west country accent asked.
"It was almost as simple as he is boatswain. A good old blood pack and plenty of piss. Plus some first rate acting on my part."
Hearing all this only confirmed what he'd already known. Maybe she was right. His soft heart and willingness to give people the benefit of the doubt were weaknesses. He caught his breath at the door as Doxy opened the final barrier. Those were bars, there were people behind them, this was a prison. The prisoners mobbed her as she entered. There were hugs all round. He stumbled at those same bars, taking a look round. These prison quarters were better than the lodgings they had at the tavern. Something, which had caught his attention when he was at the settlement, came to the front of his mind as he watched the dozen or more men and women greeting her.
"Jesus cat fucking Christ. You're pirates." He proclaimed.
"What would make you think that." Doxy asked even though he hadn't particularly intended for her or anyone to hear it."
"A few things. There's the clothing and the funny pirate accents. Then there's his eye patch and her parrot. All you need is a peg leg and you've got a full house."