What if Facebook doesn't remind you friends' b'days?
Birthdays are a special day for eveyone. Everyone like to be wished on their special day from their dear ones and feels neglected or angry if his / her dear one forgets to wish.
So, many tools were invented to remind you for birthdays of people in your social circle. Some of my friends maintain a huge email database and send those people a b'day wish through emails everyday, if it's their birthday. These days, Facebook is playing an important role in reminding or informing about birthdays of all our friends.
Yesterday, I stumbled upon an interesting conversation where a friend wondered how people used to remember birthdays of others before the Facebook era.
It's true, technology has made us very dependent over it. I vividly recollect that before the advent of mobile phones, I used to easily remember over hundred phone numbers. And it wasn't always my mind, as many times I couldn't recall a number if someone asked me but when I dialed it on phone, I could do that. Perhaps even my fingers remembered the numbers in those days. But today, I don't even remember my own phone number! Same has happened with my various passwords after I started using password managers.
But regarding birthdays, do you wish birthdays after Facebook reminds you? Personally, I don't. In fact, I don't wish birthdays to most of my friends; and to the ones I wish, I don't do that every year. I normally wish b'days to those whose b'days I naturally recollect without any effort.
Facebook reminds me several people's b'days every day. I don't make any effort to wish them all. For one, I think Facebook friends are anyway going to receive many b'day wishes and I think I'm reducing their clutter by not wishing them any. Some friends have taken down their b'day from their FB profile. Although I can still remember for some of them; I don't wish them as I know the possible reason of making a b'day private is they don't want so many wishes.
Once I too had my b'day on FB publicly viewable and received a number of wishes. So much so that I had to take help from a tool to send them an automated reply for thanking them.
Culture of celebrating b'days
This makes me wonder why do we give so much importance to birthdays! When and where did the culture of celebrating b'days originated?
I don't think b'day celebration is an Indian culture. Cakes too are foreign to my culture. I've never cut any cake on my birthday since my birth. I grew up in a vegetarian community. During my teenage years, I came to know about cakes & pastries. My relatives used to discuss whether should we eat a b'day cake or not. Since bakeries used to use eggs as an ingredient for cakes, they were a no-no for vegetarians. But later, some bakers came up with egg-free cakes. And then this debate started. The question was, how much trustworthy are these bakers and their kitchen? Mostly same baker used to serve egg-free cakes as well as cakes with egg. So it was considered unsafe to consume eggs in vegetarian community.
Over time, the penetration of cake cutting ceremonies became widespread. I too hesitantly started taking a slice of cake while attending b'day parties. Many times, I used to search reasons to escape from eating those slices. But it was only in 2012 that I refused to accept cake slice in a b'day party. To my pleasure, no one was offended. Since then I never accepted cakes. However I used to pay my share for cakes in my friends' group when it was gifted to the b'day boy or b'day girl.
Are Birthday celebrations a recent trend?
Repetition of Birthdays according to time cycle depends on how you define and measure time. When we accepted the Gregorian calendar, we started celebrating b'days according to our date of birth on an annual basis. However, earlier, people used to remember b'days according to Lunar calendar. Even today, Indians pay tribute to their relatives according to some Indian calendar like Vikram Samvat. Shraaddh date is decided by it.
Recently, I was surprised to see parents of newborns celebrating birthdays of their newborn every month! Now they are using a monthly cycle for their celebration. One can also use weekly cycle by choosing the week day of birth. It is all arbitrary.
The best I feel is to celebrate every day and every moment. Birthday doesn't take into account your birth but takes note of your appearance out of your mother's womb. But is there any doubt that you weren't alive in your mother's womb? Then when were you exactly born?
According to modern Science, many of your cells die every moment and are continuously replaced by new cells. In fact, most parts & organs of your bodies are completely replaced within a week if not in a day. So your body is actually taking birth every moment!
According to Indian traditions, a spirit / soul is never born and it never dies. Can Indian traditions support celebrating the birth of a body? I don't think so!
Can you imagine Arjuna gifting a cake to Lord Krishna and wishing him "Happy B'day" every year? Imagine Lord Krishna taking his Sudarshan Chakra to blow off candles and cutting the cake into two on his b'day in style? Or Maharaja Janak going to Sita in the forest to make her day special?
Well, all these imagination may appear unreal today but if the b'day celebration culture penetrates us enough, we will definitely create such images and make it appear as normal tradition.
In reality, birthdays doesn't denote any of our accomplishments. We should better celebrate our own life's accomplishments. In Indian spiritual tradition, when a person gets enlightenment, it is called his / her real birth and the day of enlightenment / salvation / nirvana / moksha are celebrated by all.
Here is a funny video of Freshman Philosopher by Ray William Johnson on this subject:
Your Birthday is Dumb
It's not that I'm against all b'day celebrations but this day is being quite over-rated by most people now. It's a good day to retrospect your life and plan your future or take some great resolutions. It definitely feels awesome if some intimate relative or friend remembers to wish you. But what good are all those formal or automated wishes which many are compelled to extend out of etiquette? Yes, it's a good excuse to reconnect with old acquaintances but most people are too busy celebrating their b'day that they can't give ample time to old connections except acknowledging their wishes.
Happy B'day To You!
Nevertheless, I wish an awesome birthday to all 21 million people out there who have a b'day today!