“There is a stubbornness about me that never can bear to be frightened at the will of others. My courage always rises at every attempt to intimidate me.” ― Jane Austen
I suppose the fact that I grew up in a house with four men is probably the reason for my general "attitude problem" (hahaha ok, I know it isn't a problem...lol) but many of the male counterparts that I cross paths with seem to have a really hard time accepting a female with a brain, and even worse... a mouth gawd, the horror! It is interesting actually... well no, not interesting, but borderline amusing - because most men will openly admit that this quality is one which they find enormously attractive in a woman, yet most of them only seem to be comfortable with it, "from a distance" if you will... and the one primary thing that attracted them to you in the first place, often eventually becomes the one attribute of yours which they cannot handle further down the line.
Being the youngest in the family and the only girl, living with my three older brothers and my dad, I was definitely not in the majority…haha! Every day was like survive or die with that lot I tell you! haha! So yes - in many respects, I will display character dynamics which are very parallel to that of a man. I am opinionated, sometimes arrogant, stubborn and I very seldom back down to something I don't agree with.
Now, don't misunderstand me... I am not saying that ALL men are this way inclined, but the men in my family most certainly are. Yes, they are all also very loving and compassionate men... excellent husbands and amazing fathers, BUT... there is NO shortage of testosterone there... and I suppose to large degree, much of this has rubbed off on me too...
I have suffered more teasing than anybody else I know lol… have been taunted and whipped with a dish cloth more times than I care to remember and for some strange reason, I really don't like chappies chewing gum laced with peri-peri spice....lol...I cannot imagine why not ;)
My point is, I was constantly ridiculed and belittled by my elder brothers, which as far as sibling rivalry goes, is pretty normal... but on the flip side of that coin, I was also subjected to their behaviour on a day to day basis, so I very quickly learnt how they handle situations - and eventually began to mimic that. Everything they displayed in character, I learnt and as I had no real basis for comparison, this is what and who I became too... (naturally so). Yeah... Growing up with older brothers is not for sissies I’ll tell you that much! BUT - it did teach me some VERY important life lessons and skills... one of which was INDEPENDENCE as well as the the ability to stand my ground and speak my mind.
I can recall many occasion standing in the sidelines of the passage, being witness to any one of many combinations of two of the men in our house rolling down the passage like tumbleweed as they had disagreed on one thing or another... Many times this is how certain things are dealt with by young men and it really does not take a rocket scientist to figure out why exposure to male behaviour on a daily basis would affect me and my character development too.
An example: At one stage we had two dogs and one cat. The cat adopted the habits and behaviour of the dogs... it did not want to eat its treat meat on a counter all alone, it would pick it up, throw it on the floor and eat alongside the dogs. There was another time, when we had two cats and one dog... and the dog adopted the character traits of the cats... and would run along the backs of our couches... Make sense? No? Let me put it this way...
If a man raises his hand to me you can be damn sure I will return the favour. I may come off second best, as the differences in physical strength are a simple reality... but it will not stop me from attempting to stand up for myself! I may have tolerated endless torture from my brothers, but they played a pivotal role in building a strength within me that I don't think even they expected haha!... and that ENORMOUS WILL to stand on my own two feet... you know... to "SHOW THEM" that I too, can be "TOUGH and INDESTRUCTIBLE" is what shaped me into who I am today and for that I am very, very grateful!
Not everyone likes and intelligent, opinionated and independent woman, but then again, not everybody matters lol!
“I believe in strong women. I believe in the woman who is able to stand up for herself. I believe in the woman who doesn't need to hide behind her husband's back. I believe that if you have problems, as a woman you deal with them, you don't play victim, you don't make yourself look pitiful, you don't point fingers. You stand and you deal. You face the world with a head held high and you carry the universe in your heart.” ― C. JoyBell C.
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Until next time...
Much Love from Cape Town, South Africa xxx
Jaynielea
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