I am getting very nervous about my body getting bigger as the babies grow so rapidly over the coming weeks. The main reason for this nervousness is due to the pains I am experiencing already from the babies squashing my bowel where I have previously had surgery. I miss being able to take painkillers! Warm baths have helped a little and certain positions that I lay in make a difference too.
I have been spending a lot of time on my own recently and I have been thinking often about how fascinating we are to be able to reproduce other people! Not just humans but animals too - it just all seems so surreal. I had a very vivid dream the other night that I swam into my own womb to 'check' that my little girl was okay! I saw the boy sleeping and said "Oh I know he is alright but I must check the girl", then I saw her, saw that she was fine and left before waking up!
I feel quite lonely at the moment. I have wonderful friends and family around me but I no longer have a partner so share my time and life with and I find this difficult as I never imagined being pregnant and single. In 15 weeks or less I will be a single mother to new born twins and this is scaring me.
Even though deep down I know it'll be okay - the universe has a wonderful way of looking after us when we really need it to - this doesn't stop the worry of things going wrong. I just want to be a good mother and I hope I can learn how to do parenting alone, it's easier to become a single parent as you have already established routines etc, but to start from the beginning alone feels quite different.
My bump seems to be growing in front of me which is making it difficult to do the washing up at the sink! I also forget about it often and try to fit through gaps of furniture and people that are smaller than me!
Current name choices are Harriet Grace and Oscar Charles. Harriet is currently enjoying counting my ribs with her feet frequently. I don't seem to get these sudden little attacks from Oscar at this stage but I think this is all down to positioning. He is breech at the moment.
I had a scan last week, they said that everything was looking healthy and good with the babies. :D
This image is a screenshot from my phone. Apparently each baby weighs approximately 500g and measures 30cm head to toe!
