When we were kids, we were always trying to weasel our way out of being accountable for having done things we were not supposed to do.
"I didn't do it! It wasn't me!" possibly followed by "Michael made me do it!"
But We're Not Kids Anymore...
Of course, in an ideal world we grow up to become responsible adults who own and are accountable for our own shortcomings and bad decisions.
Red daisies in the sun
But that's seldom how it works out.
This morning, I found myself thinking about just how extensively people lie and deceive... simply in order to avoid having to admit that they did-- of failed to so-- something. Or to avoid having someone see that they are actually human and have a few shortcomings.
Why are we so afraid of being "seen," as we are.
Just yesterday, I needed to pick up some work form an artist we represent at our small gallery. Already last week, he had assured us that the work (which we need for an upcoming show) was framed and ready to go... and yet, when it came time to go pick up the work, it turned out that nothing was done.
This is someone in their 40's we're talking about.
External Blame for Internal Issues
Young ducks (mergansers) playing
Seems one of the most common things I experience is people "over-promising" on some account-- possibly because they feel they "must," in order to be popular or liked or not thought less of-- and then finding a million external rationalizations and excuses to essentially cover for the fact that they simply didn't feel like doing what they had previously promised to do.
Of course, I am not holding myself up to be perfect, in that respect. But being conscious of your shortcomings and foibles goes a long way towards not having to make up excuses for people... and blaming "the wind" on why you didn't get around to some task you said you would do.
One of the things I have noticed-- over time-- is that as part of the process of being more honest, I also agree to take on far less than I used to... and I am far more willing to let people "call me names" because I am not willing to arbitrarily do their bidding.
Even so, I still ponder why we so often put so much effort into "holding ourselves harmless," even when some mistake clearly is of our own doing?
How about YOU? Do you remember saying "It wasn't me!" as a kid? Did you stop trying to evade accountability, as soon as you became an adult? Or did it happen later? Or was it not an issue at all? Do you find it strange that so many adults are unwilling to own accountability for their own mistakes or shortcomings? Leave a comment-- share your experiences and feedback-- be part of the conversation!
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Published 20170901 17:52 PDT