The other day someone accused me during a debate of gaslighting and shortly after, another person did as well. And then I thought, but seriously...
Thou art that!
But understand, we have to define first what "gaslighting" really is
So let me get it out of the way. Im gaslighting you right this very moment.
Lets not allow the word manipulate trigger emotion with this definition, because that is the surest way that we too often lose true objective meanings of things. To manipulate is merely to handle, control or influence, and we do this all the time. Its not a bad thing or a good thing. It depends on the intention and outcome.
From the definition of gaslight, I deduce that one can gaslight someone into sanity. I mean isnt that often the job of posychologists?
However, just googling images of "gaslighting", this is what I found.....
Notice anything in particular?
Its victim porn!
It seems all of those people pushed into questioning their sanity, were all sane , and so they were victims manipulated by some asshole. Im seeing these articles like mad, and all it really tells me is that we are increasingly falling into a victim culture.
Remember, Im looking at this objectively. The definition makes no emotional distinction. The emotion comes from those pushed to question their own sanity, which isnt pleasant for anyone, and that is where the negative view comes from.
So here is the big question, world, are you sane?
Again, questioning our own sanity is very uncomfortable isnt it? But there are no shortage of brilliant minds throughout all ages who have been strong enough not only to reflect on this, but also have the courage to tell it like it is.
"Insanity - a perfectly rational adjustment to an insane world." R. D. Laing "I can calculate the motion of heavenly bodies, but not the madness of people." Isaac Newton "The way it is now, the asylums can hold the sane people, but if we tried to shut up the insane we should run out of building materials." Mark Twain 'But I don't want to go among mad people,' said Alice. 'Oh, you can't help that,' said the cat. 'We're all mad here.' Lewis Carroll “That millions of people share the same forms of mental pathology does not make these people sane.” Erich Fromm "The more we retreat from the culture at large the more room we will have to carve out lives of meaning, the more we will be able to wall off the flood of illusions disseminated by mass culture and the more we will retain sanity in an insane world." Chris Hedges "It is no measure of health to be well adjusted to a profoundly sick society." Jiddu Krishnamurti “It is sometimes an appropriate response to reality to go insane.” Philip K. DickAnd last, but certainly not least...
“The real hopeless victims of mental illness are to be found among those who appear to be most normal. "Many of them are normal because they are so well adjusted to our mode of existence, because their human voice has been silenced so early in their lives, that they do not even struggle or suffer or develop symptoms as the neurotic does." They are normal not in what may be called the absolute sense of the word; they are normal only in relation to a profoundly abnormal society. Their perfect adjustment to that abnormal society is a measure of their mental sickness. These millions of abnormally normal people, living without fuss in a society to which, if they were fully human beings, they ought not to be adjusted.” Aldous HuxleyI dont think we can argue against it, world, you are insane. Im not well adjusted to you, and never will be. If the world is this insane, I can deduce that most of the people are as well. And so I will, every fucking chance I get, if the setting is right, gaslight the shit out of someone in need of it.
It wont feel good, but most things that are good for us never do. The pill may taste like shit, but the best of us, if we truly want to change, will swallow it.
So the next time someone shares another victim article, or talks about how their ex was gaslighting them, remember that the person may be a victim, but also, its very likely that they just didnt enjoy seeing their reflection. Yes, they did experience gaslighting, but the question of their sanity still remains.
With love,
Doc