Research has shown that it is not unusual for people to want to change aspects of their personality. A 2014 survey found that the following aspects of personality were common areas that we wanted to change:
*Be more extroverted
*Be more conscientious
*Be more agreeable.
In simple terms we want to be nicer to each other, more sociable, and harder working.
Although much research has shown that people’s personalities do change, and change for the better, as the life time progresses, it has been unclear whether or not we can actually choose to change our personality over fairly short term time frames.
It is unclear whether the decision people take to change themselves at certain times in their lives is one that can have a successful outcome.
To be sure, older individuals report increased satisfaction with themselves, increased sociability, decreased social anxiety, and increased agreeableness. These aspects of personality become more positive with each decade of the life.
But is it possible to actively choose to change, or is there nothing we can do to speed up the process of personality maturation, except simply wait for things to run their course in due time?
A study published in 2015 has provided initial evidence that it might be possible to make the decision to change and to be successful.
People identified aspects of their personality that they wished to change, drawn from the “big five” personality traits:
*Openness to experience
*Conscientiousness
*Extraversion
*Agreeableness
Research has shown that these constitute coherent aspects of personality that accurately describe the central features of an individual’s character. Individuals rate in either a high direction or a low direction on each one. (Though this might change depending on circumstances.)
Over the 16 week period of the study the participants attempted to change their behaviour and create a personality which they were more happy with. The assessment method was individuals results on tests of the big five personality traits.
Overall, modest progress was made towards those goals.
It was found that vague intentions, no matter how highly motivated (e.g., “I shall make an effort to work harder,” or “I shall make an effort to be more sociable”) were unsuccessful.
What worked was setting precise goals (e.g., “I will dedicate an hour of the weekend to doing something productive that I would not normally do,” or “ When I see someone I know I will make sure that I go over and start a conversation.”)
Changes were relatively small, but were statistically significant, meaning that real changes were taking place.
Hence it seems that modest results are possible in the area of intentional personality improvement.
It is best not to expect too much. Learning to accept oneself remains an important aspect of happiness. But at the same time the study suggests that it is worth attempting to change if you feel the need.
Useful references
Hudson, N. W., & Roberts, B. W. (2014). Goals to change personality traits: Concurrent links between personality traits, daily behavior, and goals to change oneself. Journal of Research in Personality, 53, 68-8
Hudson, N. W., & Fraley, R. C. (2015). Volitional Personality Trait Change: Can People Choose to Change Their Personality Traits? Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, published on line.
Vaillant, G. E. (1995). The wisdom of the ego. Harvard University Press.